IT'S STORY TIME!
Welcome to a tldr thread on #Diwali
some caveats to begin:
- I'm simplifying the story because issa long ting;
- this is the Hindu version of the story. Diwali is also celebrated by Sikhs and Buddhists;
- if you have more detailed Qs - DM me.
LEGGO!
1/n https://twitter.com/anulikesstars/status/1326807752656773120

Diwali is the "Festival of Lights". It's a celebration of 'good' over 'evil', and the pure Hindi word for it is Deepavali. Deep = light/clay lamps. Avali = row. This is why often, Hindus decorate their homes with rows of clay lamps: to bring light into darkness.
2/n

Diwali lasts 5 days, and usually happens somewhere between October and November every year. Why? Because the Hindu calendar (a Kalnirnay, in Marathi) is lunar. Our months are 28 days long. Story for another time.

3/n

Day 1: clean yo house! Buy new stuff! Start making snacks!
2: decorate! Lots of lights + rangoli (coloured powder patterns)
3: ACTUAL DIWALI. Perform a pooja (religious ceremony) to the goddess of wealth! Eat! Hug ur fam!
4: Hindu New Year!
5: brothers buy sisters presents?
4/n

Basically Indians love parties and buying gold where they can. We pray to Lakshmi (the goddess of wealth) to keep our family and friends safe and prosperous before the new year, elder relatives give yung uns money, and then sisters rinse our brothers for dollar too. But why?
5/n

So the story of Diwali is that there was a dude called Prince Ram. His dad was kind of a big deal. There was a gooorgeous woman named Sita. Everyone wanted to marry her.
There was a competition to see who the strongest man in all Ayodhya was, to win Sita's hand in marriage
6/n

There was this really really heavy and strong bow and arrow. Sita's dad said anyone who could pick it up and actually use it was strong enough for Sita. Our man Ram picked up the bow and arrow and pulled it so hard it BROKE.
Tldr; Ram and Sita got married.
7/n

CAVEAT; Lord Ram's dad had other wives and so other kids. The stories of all the kids and wives is a wild ride and kinda relevant but also kind of not? I can talk about it another time. The only one we need to know is Lakshman.
8/n

ALSO this story is highkey misogynistic. We move though.

SO! they're married. But what now?
9/n

Ram's father, the King, wanted Ram to be the king. But one of his other wives demanded that he be sent to the forest to live their for 14 years with Sita (like I said, wild) and to make her son king. Ram was obedient, so he went, and his loyal bro Lakshman went with him.
10/n

A few years in, they were chilling in the forest. A beautiful golden deer ran past them, and Sita wanted it! So Ram drew went to look for the deer. What a great husband. HOWEVER
11/n

He didn't come back for ages. Lakshman went to look for Ram. Whilst they were gone, an old man came to Sita and asked for food and drink. Turns out, it was a demon called Ravan! Some depict him with 10 heads (and so before Diwali, some communities burn a ten headed effigy).
12/n

The transformed Ravan kidnapped Sita and took her to his castle on a remote island called Lanka (aka Sri Lanka). He wanted to marry Sita.
Ram and Lakshman return and....are not happy.
13/n

Loads happens here but basically, Ram went to find Lord Hanuman (the son of wind god Vaayu, and the semi-monkey god often seen with Ram and Lakshman). I have missed many details including attempted murder. Oh well
14/n

Hanuman mobilises his #network and finds out that Sita is in Lanka! And then he assumes his huge, bigger than a mountain form (think Ant-Man) and goes to Lanka, alone, does some investigating, finds Sita and is like, bro we got this.
15/n

For reasons that I cannot explain in this thread, Ram *had* to be the one to come and get Sita, so Hanuman wasn't able to just carry her back in super-sized form. Hanuman is mad. He starts wrecking havoc. Ravan's people set his tail on fire.
16/n

Hanuman then breaks everything and yeets himself back off the island of Lanka to the mainland and to Ram. Ram prepares to go to war. One of Ravan's deflector brothers, Vibhishan, joins Rams army. Two apes, Nal and Neel, build s bridge to Lanka for the army to cross.
17/n

They cross, and a big war happens. Ram's army wins, Ravan is defeated and Sita was brought back to Ram.
18/n

At this point, 14 years have passed. Ram, Sita and Lakshman return to Ayodhya, where everyone has heard that good (Ram) has defeated evil (Ravan) and Ram and Sita are met with paths decorated with lit up clay lamps, lots of food and celebration.

19/n

I've omitted some of the problematic stuff that happened afterwards, like Sita's purity test (I know) and some of the cool details like the lady demon, the sleeping giant, and the Real Housewives of Ayodhya. But I tried.
20/n

So that's crudely the story of Diwali! We have a lot of festivals (like Holi) that all have stories like this behind them. But Diwali is our anchor. A time for reflection, family, financial planning, lights, love and food.

From my family to yours,
Shubh Deepawali.