Thread by @ElodesNL, This one time I was at an LGBTQ party and a guy [...]

This one time I was at an LGBTQ party and a guy flirted with me.

I feel flattered still now by his directness, his instant and total desire: the moment he entered the club and spotted me, he beelined *straight* towards me and wasted no time at all in making his intentions clear.

He started by just firing a ton of questions at me while making occasional body contact. What's my name? Do I live here? Do you come here often? Hey, meet my friends!

I liked his energy, but was also a little overwhelmed, and soon excused myself to return to my own friends.

But he kept at it. It wasn't long before he walked up to me, put his arm around me, and gregariously asked me more personal questions. What kind of guys am I into? (I said I was still just kind of lurking.) Cool! Did I think *he* could be my type of guy? (Oh boy.)

Later he saw me in a corner, chatting to another guy. Man, he had *none* of this. He approached me once more and interrupted our conversation by slightly dancing in front of me, and with a big smile he took my hands and pulled me towards the dancefloor. We danced a while.

In the end, after I took a bathroom break, he caught me on my way out of the club, and - realizing it was now or never - he straight-up asked me if I wanted to make out with him. I was like "hmmm

", he was like "c'mon! just a little!", and in the end we made out and I liked it.

I feel like this whole evening gave me a lot of insight into what the experience of being flirted with in a masculine manner, is (or at least, *can* be) like.

I wasn't attracted to him at the start. Even near the end I wasn't really planning on making out with him.

But I really enjoyed his positive energy. I loved feeling so openly and unashamedly desired. I loved how much time and effort and attention he put into flirting with me -- *me*!! He made me feel special; appreciated; wanted. I felt good around him; it made me really like the guy.

I felt powerful, too. He'd made it clear I had something he wanted, which meant he'd given me power over him; he clearly knew this, but instead of detesting it, he played around with it, acted in all kinds of fun ways to show how far he'd go to get me to use it for his benefit.

He showed me there's a way to be persistent and not take

s as no's, while still respecting my boundaries; at one point, in play, he suddenly put his forehead close to mine, but when I didn't kiss him, he just rolled with it and continued flirting in other ways.

All throughout I felt quite safe; I very much got the sense that though he certainly liked probing (for!) my boundaries, he would ultimately respect my wishes.

If you'd told me beforehand about a guy who flirted the way he did with me, I'd have felt quite negatively about it. Persistence? Overtness? Unsolicited touching? Not in this day and age! It's the kind of 'trad/frat male'-approach I'd never heard a single positive thing about.

But his persistence made me feel special; his overtness made me feel desired and powerful; and his touching helped me figure out where my boundaries were, and -- crucially -- where they weren't. When I finally made out with him, I felt very empowered in that choice.

And the biggest surprise of all, of course, was that the way he put these flirting principles into practice (and certainly it's not an easy approach to get right!) was imbued with such positive and playful energy - full of want but little need - that I ended up attracted to him.

I'm really grateful for that evening; being flirted with in such a positive and exceedingly masculine way is something very few straight men ever get to experience. It helped me understand how and why masculine flirting can 1) work well and 2) be wonderful for everyone involved.

Anyway: making out with a guy is surprisingly like making out with a girl.

That's all.

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