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The value in anti-moralism, as I have understood it, is in setting a preference towards actually doing something about a problem rather than in demonizing the people who commit the act.
Moralists seem to start at "X is abhorrent to me" and stop at "People who do X are bad people", although the worst of them move on to "And so we should destroy them."
My position however is at "X is abhorrent to me, therefore I must do what I can to stop X"...
My position however is at "X is abhorrent to me, therefore I must do what I can to stop X"...
... which I arrive at because I accept that "No one else is necessarily against X, because morality is not universal."
The weight of a moral argument always seems to be with tradition, conservatism, and normalcy, which is why I feel moralism is a poor tool to address reactionaries with.
This is something I draw from my experience as a former conservative, and misogynist. I don't think I'm a "bad person" for having been groomed into a society that taught me those things, but I accept it is my responsibility alone to fight those things within myself.
This is where accountability comes in, and what I mean when I say "Accountability is not something you are held to, it's something you make yourself." https://twitter.com/sloaneinhell/status/1323716535752380416?s=19
If your position is "X is not bad, so I will continue to do it", you're not really an anti-moralist in my eye, you're just giving yourself the excuse to keep hurting yourself and maybe others. I think I once described this as "Vulgar Anti-Moralism".
No one is going to pull you into a better place in life. They can reach out their hands to do so, but you have to take the opportunity to grab that. And I know first hand that that's hard and it hurts, but I also know it's worth it.
Of course, no one is obligated to reach their hands out, either. You cannot save everyone and you don't have to. You are not obligated to save your abuser or oppressor. This is what I meant in this thread about boundaries:
Thread re: boundaries:
(Note: This begins with thoughts I'm trying yo clarify in this thread. and I sort of bury the "boundaries" lede and am attempting to address this in the light of people complaining about "follow policing") https://twitter.com/sloaneinhell/status/1315576663682342917?s=19
(Note: This begins with thoughts I'm trying yo clarify in this thread. and I sort of bury the "boundaries" lede and am attempting to address this in the light of people complaining about "follow policing") https://twitter.com/sloaneinhell/status/1315576663682342917?s=19
No one is gonna pull you into a better place in your life, and no one is obligated to. Not everyone has the energy to do that. But if you want to help people, I think one of the best things we can do is reach out to one another, while also not being afraid of letting people go.
When I walked to better places in my life the first time, I did it alone, and did not have people reaching out their hands to me, because I had bit at them. And I still bite at them, even though those hands reach out to me again.
I bite at the meds I struggle to take. I bite at people reaching out to me to become close because not being alone is terrifying, not because we are known by them, but because we are misinterpreted by them, because they cannot know us as well as we know ourselves.
And I think the solution to that is to have patience with eachother, and to try and understand, not only when people wrong us, but also when we wrong others, and also to understand when we need to walk away.
