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I was a competitive track and cross-country runner when I was young (starting at 9) & would go to nationals each year/traveled a ton/it was my whole life. One of the things I learned was that, after a big race/training all season, it's really common for people to get depressed.
Not necessarily depressed as in "I feel sad about X," it was more confusing than that. You could be extremely happy about an outcome yet still feel.....floaty, emotionally muffled, physically exhausted. Like molasses, is the best way I can describe it.
The other thing I learned--& this is as true of marathon runners as it is college students after a stressful term--is that people often get sick when they've met whatever goal. Immune systems go: ok, I can relax now, damn. That was when it was *very* important to eat/sleep well
I'm reminding myself of all that today as I stare at my inbox, and all the other things I have simmering between teaching and writing and simply being a person, and feel like I might start crying. I don't want to do anything!
And it's not just work that's piled up. Heading into the election I also tabled a lot of emotional stuff; "I'll worry about that...after" was the default. Cue Steve Kornacki standing, suddenly, at the Big Board of my heart, holding his overstuffed clipboard and blinking.
This weekend was amazing and I still feel amazed & deeply relieved. And also: I feel like molasses, and to anybody else waking up feeling bad then feeling bad about it: I think this is pretty normal, actually, as I weakly high five you then try not to burst into tears
