I understand part of the issue with the US vote count is that law in Arizona requires all votes be counted *in Hungarian* by non-native speakers. This obviously increases the amount of time it takes.

Meanwhile all Nevada ballots must be licked by at least one member of a family of hereditary burlesque dancers before they can be counted. Robert Gondorf, 67, has apologised that as the only surviving member he has limited saliva.

The room in Georgia where the ballots are counted is, of course, haunted.

By the ghosts of bees.

Pennsylvania just has a shit-ton of people. It flat out takes time to count that many votes. Chill.

North Carolina’s votes are all submitted as artisanal pottery and must be successfully kilned before the results can be known. A shortage of clay left the election in 1890 hanging for twenty two days.

Obviously none of this is true, although I was delighted to find out about North Carolina’s ceramics industry.

I’m going out of my mind here. For god’s sake there’s only 360m people in the entire US.

#electionmood