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Ten years ago yesterday, I turned 35. I’d recently left a job I had become miserable at. We’d moved to Houston for my job and then the only part of our Texas experience that wasn’t great was...my job. Irony! And guilt, for asking my wife to leave everything/everyone she knew.
But then she loved it there. I came home one day, after months of having trouble even eating because of my anxiety over my spiraling job, and said to her...”I think I need to just quit and look for a new job full time.” We had a 10 month old at the time. It was scary.
But she just supported me: “Yeah, I think you should.” She went back to a job and colleagues she had loved — and which loved her — from before she had our son. Between her working and me collecting unemployment, we got by.
It also gave me six months of being one-on-one with my son every day. We watched @dpshow in the morning, I job searched every day, we ran errands, we went to @Whataburger together, and I made sure dinner was ready when my wife came through the door.
Not everybody gets to do a role reversal for a while. It was good for both of us, really. I loved having dinner cooking when she walked in.
We even switched cars. She took my commuter, high mileage sedan to downtown Houston every day and I had the family SUV. That sounds minor but car people will get what a big deal that is.
One of the most vivid memories I have that still touches me is how people responded professionally. Many friends and former colleagues (even if we weren’t ever close) leapt into action and tried to help me.
So many people got me phone screenings or interviews and promised to do all they could. It really impacted me and continues to do so. When I have a contact who needs a hand, I do whatever I can. I personally know how much it means. Even if it doesn’t lead to anything.
One former colleague was a super nice guy who always thought highly of me (for whatever reason). Within no time, he got me scheduled for a phone screen, a lunch interview and then a day of interviews right before Christmas.
By Feb, I had my official offer and I started my new job on 4/11/11. I was fortunate. I was only out of work for six months.
And so yesterday I turned 45 (good god). I’m still at that “new” employer, coming up on a decade. And I still say to people that it’s the best career move I’ve ever made. I’ve been feeling a little introspective (clearly) about this...
I quit (a word I loathe) at a dumb time — sole breadwinner, baby at home, job market wasn’t ideal — but it was what I needed to do at the time. I received indescribable support from my wife, my friends and many former work colleagues.
So what’s the point? Be lucky? 
Maybe. But also, be good to one another. Lend a hand. Help each other. Donate money. Donate your time. Be empathetic. Be decent. Be supportive. And if you need to go for something, go for it.
Maybe. But also, be good to one another. Lend a hand. Help each other. Donate money. Donate your time. Be empathetic. Be decent. Be supportive. And if you need to go for something, go for it.
Just like with having kids or moving or quitting a job...too often, we wait for the perfect time. There *is* no perfect time. Sometimes you just need to do stuff. Life is perilously short.
I wish I had a better way to end my thoughts here...but I don’t. Cheers.
