Had a lengthy discussion today and with the level of authority Allah has given a husband over his wife, sisters please YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS WITH A MAN WHOSE AUTHORITY YOU DOUBT.
If you cannot trust his judgment to be final in most cases, please just waka.

Let me just continue here.
First of all, we must all agree that as Muslims, we have agreed to submit to the will of Allah. Secondly, there is no compulsion in Religion, hence, this thread applies to Muslims.

Allah has made the husband the head of the home for reasons best known

to Him. That he is the head however does not mean he has to do everything without giving regard to the wife. Contrary to the believe that it's a slave-master relationship, It's a partnership. Each person has a role to play in the success of the home. However, before we can play

our roles, we must first be committed to being good humans. Living with a stranger is hard. You must learn to show sympathy, empathy, compassion, and care just because the next person is human. In the world we are now, saying a man has authority over his wife may come across as

"slavery" but if the man is a good man, the "authority" won't be felt. It would come across as guidance for the most part. Women will out of love, submit to a man whose judgement they trust.
Now add that he respects her, talks to her like she is a human, is compassionate?

You will think she was dosed on a love potion.
Authority no be gra gra. I am the head of the house bla bla.... Oga cam dan, do you have boils under your armpit ni? Leadership no be by too much talk ó. Even when you have a superior argument, the way you pass it across says more

about you as a person.
Let me give a real life example: Mr. D and his wife agreed to enroll their son in a particular school. By Monday, Mr. D's mother called the house to inform Mrs. D that she has paid for the son's tuition at another school. Mr. D agreed with his mother.

Mrs. D was angry. Why would her husband agree with his mum against what they agreed? He paid her little attention because Islam says he is the head of the house and has final say!!
For me, even if you wanted to agree with your mother, if truly you have what it takes to be the

head, you will find a way to convince your wife as to why you agreed. You could even give excuses for your mum. You could say "babe, she is just excited to be a grandma, I know we agreed but please let's just allow her". Just find something to make sure that you are not pleasing

one person at the expense of the other because of you ask me, the grandmother had no right to enroll someone else's child even if it's her grandchild and the father is her own son.
When issues like this go unaddressed, resentment sets in and you haveaid a foundation for FIGHTS.

What can we do?
1. Know who you are and know what you want. If you want you wife to be a housewife, please don't go for someone who wants something else only to "authorize" her to stop working. @CoveredInWords can this fly?
2. Take your time to pray and ask for Allah’s guidance.

3. Ask plenty questions. Listen to what people say about this person - good and bad. How does gbé person treat his parents and others?
Foul languages? Just anything you think might be an issue. This is why you must know yourself first. Know what values you hold dear.
4. Finances.

Have discussions around lifestyle choices and wealth creation. Is he lavish? Are you a minimalist?
5. Children. How do you want to raise and educate your kids?
6. Disputes. Will you sort issues out before sleeping? Is he too egoistic to say I'm sorry? I don't believe men don't

say sorry. Good men will talk responsibility for their action and Inactions.

I know we can't know all about ourselves but these discussions, with prayer can give us a glimpse.
A person you choose to marry is not a decision based on emotions primarily. Take it to Allah, let him

Be your guide.
May we choose what's best for us.

@CoveredInWords permission to fall out?