cisheterornormativity in the reylo fandom in particular, a thread:
(and note that i'm not saying you have to interpret them as queer and/or trans. i'm inviting you to examine WHY you're uncomfortable with the idea of either of them not being straight and/or cis.)

- "ben/rey are demisexual so they must be straight": guess what, you can be demi and bi!! or demi and gay!! demisexual doesn't have to mean "asexual except for this one specific person" (although that's still valid!)

- "i just don't like past ben/tai": you don't have to ship anyone, but if you're uncomfortable with the idea that ben canoncially had a relationship with a guy in the past, examine why that is. do you not agree with the subtext, or is it bi/homophobia?

- acting like PIV sex is the only "valid" sex in a sex-driven trope: a) virginity is a social construct. b) why are other forms of sex not considered "valid" sex? c) what if one is trans? kinda difficult to have PIV m/f sex if one person is trans

- "rey and ben can't be asexual and still fall in love": guess what, ace people fall in love! love and sex aren't the same thing! an asexual person's romantic feelings are just as valid as an allosexual person's romantic feelings!

- "a/b/o HAS to have alpha!kylo and omega!rey & lots of PIV sex": why? why do they have to fall into those gender roles? what's wrong with beta or omega kylo and alpha or beta rey? why does a/b/o HAVE to involve PIV sex?

- "rey just wants ben's cock/ben just wants rey's pussy": why is their genitalia the only motivation for sexual attraction?
- "rey only likes cock": if you mean she's straight, that's transphobic.
- "ben only likes pussy": see above comment. transphobic. full stop.

also: the fun thing about space opera is that they're in space! it's all made up! there are aliens! why aren't there more alien genitalia in canonverse reylo smut?

- "i don't want to write rey and/or ben as trans because i'm not trans & i don't want to get anything wrong": look for a sensitivity reader. do your research. trans people are people. we have stories to tell & we want to see ourselves in stories, too.

- "it's okay for rey to be queer but not ben": again, examine this thought. is it because of the bisexuality double-standard of "men can't be bi" or "bi women are secretly straight women who fake it for men's attention"?

- "call me old-fashioned, but...": GOD this phrase is a trigger for me at this point. stop acting like it's "old-fashioned" to be transphobic, homophobic, and/or biphobic. queer and trans people have ALWAYS existed. it's not a new "trend."

again: i am not saying you have to interpret these characters and canon one way or another. i am asking you to consider why you may have certain ideas or headcanons around gender and sexuality.

something else important re: demisexuality and the way it's misused/misunderstood in reylo from @MsCoppelia https://twitter.com/MsCoppelia/status/1311076841180950529

another excellent point that i think belongs in this thread. stop using "i'm clean" to refer to someone who is STI-free. it implies that people with STIs are dirty and there are better alternatives to use. https://twitter.com/nerd_leoa/status/1328105477981544448