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just finished I'm Thinking of Ending Things. it was amazing and incredibly unsettling and idk how I am going to do anything but stare at a blank wall for the next few hours
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I don't think any interpretation of this movie can be complete without considering transfeminine gender dysphoria, particularly the subtler ways it presents.
I don't think any interpretation of this movie can be complete without considering transfeminine gender dysphoria, particularly the subtler ways it presents.
SPOILERS
beyond the obvious (creating a female persona for yourself), a terror of aging in your assigned sex at birth, depersonalization, and disgust with people of your assigned sex at birth are all HUGE signs of dysphoria in adult transitioners.
beyond the obvious (creating a female persona for yourself), a terror of aging in your assigned sex at birth, depersonalization, and disgust with people of your assigned sex at birth are all HUGE signs of dysphoria in adult transitioners.
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one thing I can't stop thinking about: the way Jake's parents talk about effeminacy suggest Jake is closeted, but Lucy is herself bi (or gay; she doesn't seem to be attracted to Jake at all). the janitor, seemingly, both wants to be with a woman and wants to be a woman.
one thing I can't stop thinking about: the way Jake's parents talk about effeminacy suggest Jake is closeted, but Lucy is herself bi (or gay; she doesn't seem to be attracted to Jake at all). the janitor, seemingly, both wants to be with a woman and wants to be a woman.
SPOILERS
and that's SUCH a classic thing for queer transfeminine people pre-transition – thinking you want to be with someone when, in fact, you just want to be her.
Jake really doesn't seem to be in love with Lucy. he does, however, seem to be her.
and that's SUCH a classic thing for queer transfeminine people pre-transition – thinking you want to be with someone when, in fact, you just want to be her.
Jake really doesn't seem to be in love with Lucy. he does, however, seem to be her.
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and the last thing the janitor hears in his fantasy is "let's get you dressed," there are Psycho references throughout, and early on there's a dutch-angle shot of Lucy looking into Jake's sewing room, seemingly upset. I think you can tell what I'm getting at here!
and the last thing the janitor hears in his fantasy is "let's get you dressed," there are Psycho references throughout, and early on there's a dutch-angle shot of Lucy looking into Jake's sewing room, seemingly upset. I think you can tell what I'm getting at here!
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also the focus on maleness as inherently disgusting and the close-up of Jake's bearded mouth from Lucy's pov where it's framed as horrifying and abominable and aaaaaaaagh this movie broke me y'all
also the focus on maleness as inherently disgusting and the close-up of Jake's bearded mouth from Lucy's pov where it's framed as horrifying and abominable and aaaaaaaagh this movie broke me y'all
anyway thank u charlie kaufman for making this totally normal movie that did not make me worry about whether you're doing ok nope not at all
here is one more tweet so that spoilers do not show up by default
a big thank you to @eeleyesugh for helping talk me through this for the last hour lol
looking back, it's kinda weird that Charlie Kaufman decided to base a feature film on this @cassieceleste piece, but I respect the decision https://medium.com/@CassieLaBelle/gender-dysphoria-isnt-what-you-think-6fdc7ae3ac85
christ I can't stop thinking about this movie. more thoughts below, all with spoilers
SPOILERS
so you know how Lucy's job keeps changing? how she's a physicist, a geneticist, a painter, a poet, a film critic, and so on? and how, with few exceptions, Jake never seems to have a job?
so you know how Lucy's job keeps changing? how she's a physicist, a geneticist, a painter, a poet, a film critic, and so on? and how, with few exceptions, Jake never seems to have a job?
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all these jobs are ofc related to something Jake loved when he was younger – the pauline kael book, the book of poetry, etc. – but I can't stop thinking about the paintings.
all these jobs are ofc related to something Jake loved when he was younger – the pauline kael book, the book of poetry, etc. – but I can't stop thinking about the paintings.
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the Big Horror Basement Secret in this movie – the one the damaged door and ominous music leads up to – seems kind of anticlimactic: it's the paintings Lucy said she'd made. posters of the originals are on the walls, and Jake's attempted copies are nearby.
the Big Horror Basement Secret in this movie – the one the damaged door and ominous music leads up to – seems kind of anticlimactic: it's the paintings Lucy said she'd made. posters of the originals are on the walls, and Jake's attempted copies are nearby.
SPOILERS
this clarified something for me: every single job Lucy says she has is a job Jake wishes he could've had, instead of being a janitor. she is all of his hopeful futures rolled into one.
and in every one of those futures, he is a woman.
this clarified something for me: every single job Lucy says she has is a job Jake wishes he could've had, instead of being a janitor. she is all of his hopeful futures rolled into one.
and in every one of those futures, he is a woman.
fuck. I can't stop crying. how does this movie by a cis man understand EXACTLY what the fog of pre-transition life feels like? it's so intense.
honestly if you're cis and you want to know the exact horrible alienation, mingled hope and despair, and constant low-grade disorientation trans people live with before transition, just watch this movie
