The other day, my friend offered me some framboise (raspberry liqueur) with some celebratory champagne. Slightly drunk, I reminded her I don't speak French. Her reply:

‘I know you're so passionate about etymology, so I didn't want to assume you didn't know.’

It struck me as a good illustration of the opposite of mansplaining. My friend waited for me to ask. She didn't just assume I was in the dark about something in which I have professed an interest, and have some knowledge.

Men often don't do that. They explain without prompting.

As it happened, if I'd been less drunk, I actually would have known ‘framboise’ – it's like ‘frambuesa’ in Spanish, which I learned for years. My friend likely knew this, as she knows I used to be conversationally fluent.

She explained. But only when I asked her to explain.

Reply guys, take note. Ask yourself how likely it is that a woman knows what you're about to tell her – ESPECIALLY if she's discussing an area in which she has previously revealed an interest.

Don't assume you need to explain publishing to an author, or paint to a painter.