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I just entered a store to find a maskless man yelling at a clerk, refusing to observe the local mask mandate and refusing to leave store property. I walked around and stood side by side with the clerk in solidarity. (I’m quite tall.) He left. So: abusive, selfish, and a coward.
(The clerk was a physically small but absolutely indomitable woman.)
It was one of those moments where you have a second to decide what to do. It would have been so easy to let it pass, to not get involved. Could he have flipped out and attacked? Absolutely. But I my involvement totally changed the dynamic. Defused the situation.
He went from holding the power in the situation — by way of aggression and abuse — to being the outsider of a group. In one second, it all changed. It’s really sad to think of the hate and rage he carries around with him all day. I can certainly guess where he gets his “news”.
If there isn’t a reckoning with media outlets that create anti-factual parallel universes and stoke “hate for profit” (as @ewarren puts it so well) then we will continue to struggle with basic unity and collective action for public good. And there will be many, many more Trumps.
I’m not fishing for accolades, I’m sharing this experience because it was really astonishing to see how quickly the tide turned when the abuser wasn’t in control anymore. It was literally like flipping off a light switch. I suspect many abusive people are fundamentally insecure.
This situation is making me think about the many wise words of @docrocktex26, who has explored this dynamic many times. But it was truly amazing to see it happen in real time. I didn’t expect it — I wasn’t thinking beyond the moment — but in retrospect it makes so much sense.
And why do I get the sneaking suspicion that this guy — yelling so loudly and masklessly about how the store didn’t have the right to refuse his business — would take the opposite position regarding bakeries making cakes for gay couples?
Yikes, this kind of blew up, so let me just say that
(1) I’m not interested in media interviews
(2) alas this happened in Toronto, Canada
(3) I’m not going to name the store
(4) yes, our cable companies carry Fox
(4) we do have a mask mandate here
https://www.toronto.ca/home/covid-19/covid-19-what-you-should-do/covid-19-orders-directives-by-laws/mandatory-mask-or-face-covering-bylaw/
(1) I’m not interested in media interviews
(2) alas this happened in Toronto, Canada
(3) I’m not going to name the store
(4) yes, our cable companies carry Fox
(4) we do have a mask mandate here
https://www.toronto.ca/home/covid-19/covid-19-what-you-should-do/covid-19-orders-directives-by-laws/mandatory-mask-or-face-covering-bylaw/
Oops I put two number 4’s, sorry
Okay everyone I’m legitimately not a hero. I just wanted to share a little experience from my day.
Thank you to everyone leaving kind words. I wish I could respond to everyone personally, but this thread has gone crazy so there’s just no way. Please thank a front line worker! They really need our gratitude and solidarity and support. They are holding our society together.
And to anyone who has lost someone they love to the “hate for profit” media machine, I recommend an outstanding documentary called “The Brainwashing of My Dad”. It’s an insightful exploration of root causes — and it has a happy ending! @BrainwashingDad https://www.thebrainwashingofmydad.com/
