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From the moment my father was diagnosed w leukemia, I saw how savings played the role in ensuring your family stays afloat. His company’s benefits were great but after 2-3, he was on unpaid leave whenever he was hospitalised. https://twitter.com/themotleyfool/status/1304089786127441929
I was 12 but I was deeply impacted by the conversations my parents had about bills, loans which I overheard. I actually did ask, “Are we poor?” & my parents would always be suprised I’d even ask that question. But I could see how our lifestyle changed.
I felt guilty all the time whenever I needed new things or had to go for tuition etc, and that in a weird way, forced me to work hard because failing in school was not an option esp when my BM tuition was RM60 a month and to me, as a 12 year old, was so much money!
As the oldest, I used to argue with my younger sisters a lot when it came to going to the movies or wanting gifts or eating out - I wanted to yell (and I did lol), “WHY CANT YOU SEE THAT WE NEED TO SAVE?”. But they were kids. I was too.
And through my teens, the same guilt would follow. My dad passed but now my mum was the sole breadwinner with a nurse’s salary in Malaysia, with three mouths to feed. It was really a time I knew I took a lot on when I didn’t need to but in the end, that has made me to be stronger
Getting a scholarship was THE only option for me. But in my SPM year, I was failing, I hated the sciences but I was put into that stream since I was a “good student”. I failed almost all my science subjects. But pulled through.
6As4Bs, my SPM results. Imagine being such a great student and bringing home those results and the GUILT of not being able to apply for most scholarships but I did anyway. I didn’t fit the criteria but I allowed myself to try.
Eventually, I did get a scholarship.
Eventually, I did get a scholarship.
I remember the day when I got that phone call abt a week after my interview and thought they were joking. And since then, I knew I had to always fend for myself. Never depending on my mum. I took side jobs during uni and even worked as a waitress overseas to fund myself.
When I look back,
That scarcity did in fact, bring its limitations to my mind. Constantly worrying “what if I don’t have enough money?”. It gets toxic when continued, this thinking. Now at 25, in my second job, I’m shifting this towards how scarcity had allowed growth for me.
That scarcity did in fact, bring its limitations to my mind. Constantly worrying “what if I don’t have enough money?”. It gets toxic when continued, this thinking. Now at 25, in my second job, I’m shifting this towards how scarcity had allowed growth for me.
At 17 onwards, I was living away from home, supported my own lifestyle, hobbies through my side income of working as a clerk/waitress/work exchange program.
That is/was my experience.
That is/was my experience.
