kipply the finance bro, a thread

these are not good opinions/views on finance please don't hurt me

i am passionate about making markets more efficient

my hobby is 1000+ dollar coin flips because the expected value is zero and i get thrill! trust me im a quant trader

i miss @matt_levine money stuff so much i am nothing without it

{this is just regular me, oops}

i work in finance because 80,000 hours told me to

Yeah, I understand that hedge funds aren't the greatest companies but actually my hedge fund is the most ethical hedge fund

i would never commit financial crimes because of my extensive education and workplace training to teach me exactly how not to commit financial crimes

200k is tuesday

https://twitter.com/olivia_vault_/status/1303003171883712512

im passionate about the intersection of finance and art https://www.etftrends.com/equity-etf-channel/is-investing-in-fine-art-a-better-option-than-bonds/

come on, we are not actually worse than facebook https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/katienotopoulos/patagonia-power-vest-policy-change

homelessness in silicon valley really shows what capitalism does to humanity

i just want to meet a nice girl i can be nice to and we can get a home in jersey and the hamptons and manhattan and brooklyn and go to flushing for brunch on weekends what's wrong with that

i'm from uchicago and there is an econ building that we call "Money Church" because it's where the Chicago Theological Seminary was.

and those silicon valley kids say we can't innovate and disrupt

stop it we're not a hedge fund omg we're just a trading company it's different we're cuter

we are backbone of the middle class, we make shit like mortgages and etfs possible

if we had 1 hour trading days i could moonlight as a dj and it wouldn't really affect the middle class because they don't actually own any stocks lmao

the thing that makes us different from tech companies is that they highlight all their perks to become the coolest hippest place to work but we have to hide all our perks lest we seem "elitist" or "filthy rich" or "the dumbest thing you could possibly make money off of"

(regular kipply)

the only thing that makes me more angy than ppl roasting me on hn is ppl roasting totally adorable finance companies for being elitist