I’d really like queer people who get to live in safe situations to consider what it’s like for the rest of us. And consider what a danger it can be, to be out in queer media if you don’t live in a queer friendly place, in an industry that has the same attitude as Gaby. https://twitter.com/gabydunn/status/1303917426719899648

I have spent most of 2020 dealing with the fall-out of multiple professionals failing to treat my safety--and how my sexuality affects my safety as a rural queer--seriously and as a result, their mistakes destroyed my life as I know it. This attitude in the above QT?

Is the exact attitude that I encountered. This bafflement that I needed safety. The casual disregard of safety. The DIMINISHMENT of the situation. It's not "feeling weird if someone asks you if you're queer, ppl. It's "fearing for your life" because that's how you get to live.

If this privileged attitude continues in our industries, while at the same time they draw in marginalized ppl to exploit, someone's going to make a privileged mistake that gets some1 killed. There were a few months this year, I thought it would be me. That is how serious this is.

And to everyone asking so nicely: no, I'm not okay. I will never, ever be okay. Because a series of careless mistakes--and people not taking my marginalizations and the risks seriously--altered the course of my life and my work forever. I will never not look over my shoulder now.

People deal with v. real dangers in their lives. If you're a pro who wants to work w/ writers who are queer, who are domestic violence survivors, anyone who has privacy issues? You better be prepared not to fuck up. Because if you fuck up, you're fine. Your author pays the price.

And sometimes that price is "I have to leave the only home I've ever known, the land that I've invested 8 years of my life into building up and financially set myself back a decade because my publisher didn't take me seriously when I said "Hi, people want to kill me."

This is why I take objection to diminishing queer people's reactions to being asked their sexuality as "feeling weird"

Your life should not have to change because you wrote queer content unless YOU want it to change. You don't owe anyone anything but the story they bought.

But if you see me drawing away further from social media, this *waves* is why. I'm sorry. I genuinely love connecting with all my readers. I've adored watching some of you grow into adulthood, but the mistakes that were made unfortunately have given my stalkers more access to me.