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On Sunday it was Father's Day, and it also marked 35 years since my dad died by suicide. Suicide is complex, and I spent the first part of my life trying very hard to understand. I find #RUOKDay incredibly difficult because the message is that people will be ok if we simply care.
I was four when he died and as a child who lost their parent to suicide I am more likely to: attempt or die by suicide, experience a psychiatric or development disorder, be hospitalised for depression, and struggle to sustain a long-term relationship.
I understand that #RUOKDay is designed to reduce stigma around mental health and encourage open and honest conversations with our friends and family and community.
But it troubles me that #RUOKDay turns the conversation away from addressing the systemic drivers of suicide. I want to talk about how to dismantle patriarchy and white supremacy and ableism and toxic masculinity.
I want to talk about how to increase access to evidence based medical services and family violence support services and housing and financial stability.
It's important to build strong community and to reduce the stigmatisation of mental health. But we can't ignore the systemic drivers that impact the suicide rates.
