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Reading this earlier made me happy. I thought I'd share. Love languages, with an avoidance list: (a thread)
With physical touch you can:Offer massages, initiate intimacy, make hugs a habit, non-sexual touch that reminds them of your presence, putting your arm around them or embracing them.
With physical touch, avoid: Long periods without intimacy, coldly giving affection, waiting for your partner to express their desire for physical affection.
With words of affirmation try: leaving encouragingnotes, creating playlists of songs that remind you of them, sharing sentiments for your partner's successes and struggles, complimenting them, words of appreciation.
With words of affirmation, avoid: assuming that they know how loved they are, assuming that they know you are proud of them emotionally harsh words, not recognizing or appreciating their efforts.
With quality time you can try: being mentally present when you're with them, making plans to visit new places, uninterupted time, putting away your phone, creating small moments to connect, quality conversation.
With quality time, avoid: being distracted when you are with them, viewing your partner as needy, complaining about time spent together, preparing for other engagements when you're together.
With recieving gifts, try: thoughtfullness in gift giving, giving souvenirs when you travel without them, gifts that symbolise moments, experiences or feelings, small reminders or tokens when they don't feel their best, being intentional on holidays, especially their birthday.
With recieving gifts, avoid: Forgetting special occasions, materialism (gifts are not about the cost), giving gifts without love or out of duty.
With acts of service, try: showing rather than telling, following through with what you say you'll do, helping with stressful or time-consuming tasks, looking for small ways to help them, being spontaneous.
With acts of service, avoid: ignoring requests for help, not following through, being closed minded (like feeding into gender-based stereotypes) when it comes to tasks.
I think understanding your partner can only ever have a positive outcome. It's important to know what you can do to show someone who's special to you that you love them in a way that they understand and can appreciate.
This, however, doesn't just apply to partners. It's nice to have friends who understand your love language and will do thoughtful things for you based on that.
