Ok I’ve been thinking & I honestly believe that you can compare every single person to a type of potato and it’s correct.

Here’s a thread on some Tory MPs as potatoes:

Boris Johnson:
A sprouting, green, Maris Piper Potato. After going through the best production, in organic potato farms, he’s been left in the cupboard for too long and should have been thrown in the bin ages ago. Starting to make others mouldy and green.

Rishi Sunak:
A lightly spiced wedge that gives the people slightly more sex appeal than a normal wedge.

Priti Patel:
A potato smiley that has simply gone wrong in production and now has a frown. You serve it to your child and they have nightmares of the potato frown that will haunt them in their sleep. Evil.

Matt Hancock:
A school lunchtime Jacket Potato that has been cooked in the microwave and is ready to fold and break under any pressure from cheese or beans. No seasoning. Just pure potato.

Dominic Raab: a soggy, undercooked and soft McDonald’s chip. You really don’t want to eat it because you might get ill so you give it to a pigeon instead. The pigeon runs away from the chip.

Jacob Rees-Mogg:
A thin and tall potato croquette that’s crusty on the outside, yet bland and mundane in the middle. Always looks posh but tastes terrible. Needs ketchup.

BONUS - Dominic Cummings:
A disappointed potato in a roast dinner that turns out to be a roasted parsnip. Really doesn’t belong on the plate.