Thread by @benson_smythe, I don’t remember where I saw it but there was a conversation [...]

I don’t remember where I saw it but there was a conversation about VA’s and NSFW audios where guys will say “After I started talking to you I started to respect you and couldn’t cum to your audios anymore.”

It reminded me of The Friendzone. 1/

You created the Friendzone because you can’t deal with rejection, a twitter thread.

You didn’t respect a sexworker because of what they did, just like many guys create the friendzone they feel put in because they never actually respected the people they “befriended” 2/

So you know a girl, woman, female, chick, whatever term you use. She makes you tingly in your loins. You want her to be your girlfriend. You talk to her. You keep talking. You’re a nice guy, women like nice guys. She’ll learn to trust you and fall for you. 3/

Except she doesn’t. She dates other guys and you don’t see what she sees in them when you’re right there for her. She should be seeing you. Why doesn’t she see you the way she sees them?!?!? You’ve been nothing but nice and sweet and kind! When is it your turn to go?!? 4/

You don't get a turn you find out. Then she says the horrible words, “You’re the best friend a girl could have. You’re like a brother to me.” and oof she tossed you into the friend zone. You smile and nod for a while because maybe she’ll stop seeing you like that. 5/

Except she doesn’t, and it frustrates you more and more because you’re the one that is always there for her and sacrificing can’t she see that. You start to get frustrated and then you do something stupid. You might have yelled, you might have invaded her personal boundaries. 6/

You might have assaulted her.

Yes kissing her without consent is assault.

Now you hurt her and you’re sorry, but she doesn’t care, but you wouldn’t have done that if she’d only see…Okay, Bro, I’m going to stop you right there. 7/

You wanted a relationship with her from the get-go, and you didn’t tell her from the get-go. You want her to settle for nice when she wants amazing. You’re not amazing. You might do things that are amazing for her, but you yourself are not it. 8/

The moment you couldn’t confront her with “Hey, I’m sorry, but I find you attractive and I’d like to go out on a date with you…if you don’t we can part ways and…”

Yes, part fucking ways.

You wanted a relationship with her from the jump. 9/

Don’t think this whole “slow play till they realize they love you because you're nice” isn’t just you trying to play on their emotions, because that’s exactly what you are doing. You’re no better than the guys they dump that do the same thing. 10/

“But Benson!” You say, “I’ve been friends with this one girl and I’m just now noticing she’s a girl and I want her!” Do you actually want her or are you fucking lonely? Has she made any signs, like a brick to the head signs that she sees you like that? No? 11/

Choose. Ruin the friendship or go find someone else to date.

Get out of your friend's circles. Go on virtual dates via dating apps or local message boards. If the pandemic ever ends go on meetups. Meet people that are actually looking to date so you're on the same page 12/

Along time ago I realized I’d rather keep a friendship than fuck things up with a relationship, so I couldn’t date friends. I dated people. I dated people that became FWB leaning mostly on the WB part for both sides. I dated people that after one date they ghosted. 13/

I dated someone for 7 years and should have lasted only 6 months but I didn’t know what a Yandere was at the time.

The friendzone doesn’t exist when you were never her friend to begin with. The friendzone doesn't exist when you do something that isn’t friendly anymore. 14/

The friendzone is your incel like state of mind.

Your “friends” are better off without you.

Can it happen? Friends actually becoming couples that become good relationships? 15/

Yes, it can happen, but I can tell you from my experience witnessing other friends that became couples, one of them never had a secret longing for an extended period of time. It just fell into place naturally.

If you think the friend zone exists it will never be natural. 16/

You can't force nature if you want natural.

If you can't actually be her friend, don't be her friend.

Don't blame her. It's not her fault you didn't respect her to begin with.

That's all on you. You're a part of the reason why women have to say #yesallmen. Hurt's don't it? 17/

But is that hurt your realization that you fucked up your relationships with women because you didn't listen to them and secretly treated them like objects or anger that they don't see you as the nice guy you are?

Stop being a selfish prick. 18/

Get angry at me as long as you aren't getting angry at her... but if this made you stop to think... if I stopped you from the path you are on... Maybe you can actually be her friend before you ruin it and start figuring yourself out.

Get help. Therapy is good! 19/

Start your reflection with a professional. I'm not saying you have a completely healthy mind to date or fall in love, but do what you can not to actually be toxic. /fin

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