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Friends. It is Very Hard to do academia without an academic job, no matter how much you want to. Apart from some ongoing commitments already began, I’m taking a pause from academia for a short while. A few thoughts (largely expressed through @jvn gifs) 
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I know I’m not alone here, as honest conversations with friends have shown me, but my relationship with this sector has become toxic. It is demanding so much from me (as it is for so many colleagues in precarious positions) and giving hardly anything in return.
Whilst some manage (and I commend you!), I have become burnout by trying to research and meet my own publication targets on top of a non-academic day job. It’s unsustainable, and - on top of a long line of academic job rejections - it makes me feel pretty terrible.
I am confident in my skills and know my CV is excellent - and this is not a thread asking for reassurance about my abilities. It’s to flag that academia places A LOT on the shoulders of ECRs who want to pursue their academic dream that it really shouldn’t.
I’m not taking a break because I want to or have ‘given up’, but because I need to take care of myself. To think about other paths I’d like to find and travel for myself.
I’ve had Very Lovely talks with friends and mentors in the field who have said such kind words about my work and contributions, which mean THE WORLD...
...but, and I really don’t want this to come across wrong, it places a lot on ECRs to be told it would be a shame if we were no longer in the field. Because we ARE trying, but there simply isn’t the secure opportunities needed for many of us to stay. Really, it’s not up to us
This is not our fault, or something precarious ECRs should feel responsible or guilty for. I’m taking a break to take care of myself, to get some guilt-free space and time, and hopefully clarity.
And that is all thank you for coming to my TEDTalk. And if you’re an ECR reading this and debating if you want (not just ‘need’!) to take a break, it probably means you would prefer to take a break (from personal experience).
