What to do if someone comes out to you as a system? - a thread

1. Believe them. Don't question their multiplicity/plurality when you basically don't know them. It's not your place to tell them that they don't have DID/OSDD. Just believe them and listen to them

2. Be gentle, kind and comforting. Don't rush them, don't try to force them to tell you something they said they're not ready to tell yet.

3. Ask them if there are any triggers you should know about. Don't try to 'check if trigger works', don't say 'it's too stupid'/'hard to avoid'. Don't joke about it unless you know 100% that a system is comfortable with this kind of jokes

4. Don't force them to tell you about their trauma. They'll tell you if/when they're ready. It's a very sensitive topic and not something you can talk about easily

5. Don't tell others about their DID/OSDD if you don't have their consent. Only the system decides who to tell about their multiplicity/ plurality and who not to

6. Don't say something like 'Oh, so it's like 'Split'?'/'Basically you're schizophrenic?'/'Do you have a killer alter'? DID/OSDD is a very stigmatized disorder and hearing misconceptions like those really hurts

7. Don't be afraid to ask questions. It's okay if you didn't know about DID/OSDD before and there's nothing wrong asking questions questions. I'm sure they'll explain everything to you!

8. Respect their boundaries. If they tell you that 1 of the alters doesn't like to be touched, don't touch that alter, if they tell you that 1 of the alters is mute, don't try to make them talk. It's easy and definitely means a lot to a system

9. Show them that they're safe with you and that you want to talk to all alters. When alters front, make sure to make them feel accepted. Show the system that everyone can talk to you and nothing bad will happen

10. Basically, have a good time! Remember that systems are not dangerous and are usually amazing, kind and caring people! Good luck to all of you, love you guys!~