[CW: sexual violence]

1. Allegations have recently come to light that Dee Kosh propositioned teenagers for sex. If true, these actions are deplorable.

It is categorically wrong to engage a minor in sexual conversation. And quid pro quo sexual harassment is never acceptable.

2. In fact, in any situation that involves a clear power differential between parties—due to an age gap, fame or professional position—consent becomes gray (at best). That should be apparent to anyone, particularly an adult, with a decent grasp of consent.

3. We commend all the individuals who have spoken up thus far about their experiences. We know how difficult it can be for men in particular to come forward about situations of abuse and exploitation, thanks to misguided societal ideas relating to homosexuality and machismo.

4. It is not easy, as well, to call out a powerful public figure and stand your ground in the face of gaslighting and threats of litigation.

We also support Eliza Teoh, who has shared her and writer Nicole Choo’s experiences of online harassment at the hands of Kosh.

5. In addition our thoughts are with another group of assault survivors: those who followed Kosh’s media output and especially those whom he featured on his platforms. A few weeks ago AWARE was invited onto Kosh’s podcast The Tea With Dee, expressly to talk about sexual violence.

6. The two other guests on that episode were rape survivors who went by the pseudonyms Violet and Dash. During the episode, our ED Corinna Lim listened to both of their accounts of rape, and gave them emotional support and counsel.

7. After the conversation, Violet told Corinna she felt lighter, less alone and more validated.

Kosh was part of the discussion, expressing sympathy for the survivors and horror at the acts of violence they had experienced.

8. Reflecting on that now, it’s hard not to feel some level of hypocrisy, or even a sense of exploitation—that this allegiance with survivors was meant to signal to Kosh’s audience some sort of progressive understanding that wasn’t actually there.

9. We imagine that these survivors, and others in his audience, may be feeling quite betrayed right now. Please know that you can always reach out to AWARE for support. For Violet and Dash, we hope the circumstances of the conversation do not override the value of what was said.