This thread is for discussion purposes only on a specific issue. Kindly do not associate or relate it to anyone’s personal life. It’s a general discussion. Anyone who abuses, taunts or makes this personal will be blocked. 1

For generations, emphasis has been placed on the rights of parents. Children, especially boys from a very young age are taught how they should fulfill their duties & responsibilities towards their parents. 2

This is constantly reinforced throughout his life, especially right before & after he gets married.

Why isn’t the same man taught the responsibilities he has towards his wife from a young age the same way he is taught about his parents? 3

How many parents sit with their sons before marriage and explain to him what is expected from him, what his duties are as a husband and how he needs to strike a balance between his relationships so that no one suffers? 4

As a result of this, rights of wife are trampled on b/c the man has never been taught about them leading to marital problems & eventually breakdown of marriage. 5

Parents often fail to realize that their son now has a responsibility that needs to be fullfilled as well & instead of helping him most parents start burdening him with unjust expectations & become even more possessive of him.
6

I am in no way undermining the rights of parents. The importance of that remains un-challenged. But how can one expect to enter ‘jannat’ by fulfilling rights of one while usurping the rights of other? 7

I strongly believe in keeping a balance in all relationships. Giving everyone their due rights. If a balance isn’t kept, sooner or later the equation will breakdown. Sometimes it results in the relationship between the parents and their son breaking down. 8

Most of the time it is the marriage itself breaking down. If none of that happens, the woman (who is almost always the bahu) sacrifices herself to keep her marriage intact, and continues to suffer in silence for the rest of her life. 9

Who is at fault here?Do we as parents need to change our parenting ways & be more understanding towards our children & their needs &not burden them with our unjust expectations by expecting them to make ‘sacrifices’for us because we did the same for them? 10

Should we as parents better prepare ourselves for old age so that we are less dependent on our children both financially and physically? 11

Do we teach our sons to be more just towards all relationships and have a balanced approach or do we teach our daughters to remain silent and sacrifice and continue to endure & give up everything because one day things will get better? 12 END