THREAD:

1) This reminds me of a story. ...

2) A church-going man was watching the evening news, when it was reported that there was a flash-flood warning for his county. The reports indicated that the waters were headed in the direction of his town, even.

3) But the man refused to worry - "I am a God loving, church-going man, I believe and have faith, like Noah, God will save me from the waters of the flood."

The waters came, and soon he had to move to the second floor of his home, or be under water.

4) But he wasn't worried. "I am a God loving, church-going man, I believe and have faith, like Noah, God will save me from the waters of the flood."

5) The waters continued to rise, and soon he had to go through the crawl space in the attic and out onto the roof, but he wasn't worried. "I am a God loving, church-going man, I believe and have faith, like Noah, God will save me from the waters of the flood."

6) A man in a rowboat came by, and said, "Get in the boat, I'll take you to safety!"

The man refused. "No, your boat is small, and I'd likely swamp it. but I'm not worried. I am a God loving, church-going man, I believe and have faith, like Noah, God will save me."

7) The waters swept the boat on and soon it disappeared downriver. The man moved up higher toward the peak of his roof.

A helicopter flew overhead. A man leaned out the side door, and threw a ladder down to the man on the roof. "Climb up, we'll take you to safety!"

8) "No. That ladder looks flimsy and would probably break under my weight. But I'm not worried. I am a God loving, church-going man, I believe and have faith, like Noah, God will save me from the waters of the flood."

9) The helicopter pilot spotted someone else and flew off to save them, trying to get as many as they could; they couldn't wait for the man to change his mind, they had to get the others who were waiting.

10) The waters continued to rise. The man drowned, and went to Heaven, and when he came before the Lord, said, "Lord, I was a God loving, church-going man, I believed and had faith, that, like Noah, you would save me from the waters of the flood. Why did you let me drown?"

11) God looked at the man, and said, "My son, I sent a news report, a man in a boat, and a helicopter. What else was I supposed to do?"

Moral of the Story: God loves those who help themselves. Wear the damn mask.