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It occurs to me that some of you might not have got the joke here...
This account generally specialises in failure, but I will happily throw everything out the window for Turbinia.
It might look like a scale model but it is utterly, gloriously beautiful at speed.
It might look like a scale model but it is utterly, gloriously beautiful at speed.
When Turbinia was launched in 1894 it was the fastest ship in the world. The only way to go faster was by sailing over the edge of a very tall waterfall, and you still wouldn't be going faster than Turbinia for very long.
The brains behind Turbinia belonged to this bloke here, Charles Algernon Parsons, and his great breakthrough was designing the first useful steam turbine.
Turbinia was designed to show off what it could do.
Turbinia was designed to show off what it could do.
The usual telling of the Turbinia story tends to imply that the Admiralty had no idea what Parsons was up to in the wilderness of Newcastle.
They did - they just didn't know what he was about to do with it. In proper Geordie style Turbinia was about to wreck the mic.
They did - they just didn't know what he was about to do with it. In proper Geordie style Turbinia was about to wreck the mic.
In 1897 Parsons took Turbinia down to the Royal Review at Spithead, where the Royal Navy was showing off all its shiny toys to the Queen.
Parsons hadn't been invited, of course, but if you have a boat capable of going 7 knots faster than anything the Royal Navy owned what are they going to do about it?
So it proved. Turbinia raced up and down the fleet whilst an increasingly pissed off navy tried to intercept it.
A point had been proven. The first Parsons-driven destroyer, HMS Viper, was ordered in early 1898.
The turbine era had arrived.
The turbine era had arrived.
Turbinia itself survives, despite being briefly and excitingly rearranged by a ship being inconsiderately being launched into it.
It's now on display in the city of its birth, in Newcastle's Discovery Museum, and it's still as shockingly beautiful as it ever was.
We all know the old engineering adage, and hell yeah - this looks right.
We all know the old engineering adage, and hell yeah - this looks right.
