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I appreciate that hedgehogs are a fairly niche interest. But they repay study: last night’s feeder footage was like Thrilla in Manila meets The Colbys.
Episode 1: Tiggypatch, a young lad about town, was stood quietly in the kebab shop minding his own, when glowing eyes appeared at the window. Sluggy, the local enforcer, had arrived. And he was hungry.
Episode 2: intent on his punch-up with Tiggypatch, Sluggy sadly fails to notice the arrival of the menacing, and possibly slightly psychotic, top man himself, Big Willie.
Episode 3: Big Will unhesitatingly hurls Sluggy from the kebab shop, following up with the proverbial toe of his boot.
Episode 4: Big Will returns to the food counter, seemingly unreactive to young Tiggypatch’s presence beyond a mildly malicious shove.
Episode 5: but it’s just not in Big Will’s nature to share a kebab. Tiggypatch is unceremoniously helped on his way outside. Big W celebrates with a display of assets to any remaining doubters. The shop is his!
I am fabulously overrun with hedgehog blokes, here. Something is missing!
