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yosef rocking up to his job interview w potiphar:
THE AUTHOR OF SHIR HASHIRIM: i just wrote a new poem
ME: oh cool what’s it about
THE AUTHOR OF SHIR HASHIRIM:
ME: oh cool what’s it about
THE AUTHOR OF SHIR HASHIRIM:
when u get to ur first secret cabal meeting of the elders of zion but nobody’s taught you how to apply for ur rothschild stipend yet
CAIN: so then god asked if i knew where abel was—
YOU: so do you believe in god?
YOUR DAD:
YOUR DAD:
when u go to an ultraorthodox day school for 13 years and also jewish youth group for like 10 years
when americans decide to start latke discourse in august
AVRAHAM: so what do u think of my idea
ALL HIS FRIENDS:
ALL HIS FRIENDS:
when my mums friends ask me what i plan on doing in israel for two years
MY FRIEND: do you wanna go to this concert? it’s during the nine days though
ME:
ME:
YITZCHAK: bro why did u sell ur birthright??
ESAV:
ESAV:
me realising how little i actually know about jewish texts:
