Going out for the day tomorrow. I have stated 16854 times that we are setting off at 8.30. Anyone not ready shall be left behind.

So one has started concocting a chocolate milkshake, with nutella and chocolate biscuits.
One is cooking a pizza and one has decided to wash and dry her hair.

Why tho?

Me... Ellie, fetch me everything you are planning on wearing tomorrow.

This minimises the risk of her looking like a hooker or a shop lifter... Or both

She appears with a bikini top and some age 9 shorts.

She is almost 13.

Mam did I tell you none of my sliders/ flip flops fit me?

No... no you did not tell me this.
I mean you could have, when we were stood in front of ALL THE FLIP FLOPS IN ASDA THIS AFTERNOON, but no, no you didn’t

Me... Everyone needs to charge their phones. There shall be no spare USB ports in the car.

Everyone ... *carries on staring at Tik Tok*

Oh, they are all now loudly deciding what to watch on Netflix.
WE HAVE AN 8.30AM SET OFF YOU BASTARDS

1 is eating breakfast. 1 (Megan’s boyfriend) has decided to clean his trainers with a toothbrush in the garden. 1 there is no sign of yet. Husband awake but just laying staring at the ceiling with a glazed expression.

Nope, the other one is up, however she hasn’t decided what to wear so now needs to try everything on.

Just about to set off... Husband states he had better have a shit first.
A teenager has gone back upstairs and the hair dryer is on.... WE WERE AT THE DOOR

One ready

2 ready

Megan’s boyfriend needs a shit. He has also lost a sock

I AM IN THE CAR

A twin is in the car and her boyfriend.

Her ... Hold the camera central ffs. I need to do my hair

Him... you look fine!

Her... *top lip touches eyebrows* I do not! I look like Mum.

All in the car....

Right, has everyone had a wee? Charger? Bag? Money? Snacks?

Two get back out.

We have set off...

There is a kid on this beach called Narnia.

Me and Liam are sprinting back to the car.

Laters dick heads