mom: honey they’re saying it will start raining soon, maybe we should move your birthday party inside

7 year old clay: MOM WHY ARE YOU BEING SO NEGATIVE

mom: bud I saw a weather report

clay: WHY ARE YOU ROOTING AGAINST MY BIRTHDAY

mom:

1/3
clay: LOOK, IT’S NOT RAINING, PLUS BEN’S DAD SAID THAT WEATHER REPORT IS WRONG

mom: let’s order pizza and watch a movie inside

clay: YOU CAN’T LIVE YOUR LIFE IN FEAR

mom: ok it literally just started raining

clay: RAINDROPS ARE A LAGGING INDICATOR THE CLOUDS ARE PASSING

2/3
mom: your friend Jason just slipped on the patio and broke his wrist

clay: DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY AMERICANS BREAK THEIR WRISTS EVERY DAY

mom:

clay: MY PRESENTS ARE SOAKED

mom: yes moron it’s raining on them

clay: BEN’S DAD WAS WRONG AND FOR THAT I APOLOGIZE

3/3
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