I'm sorry if I'm woman-splaining. But sometimes, the problem is you men seek companionship/exclusivity/permanency from women who don't want the same thing as you. Or they want it but not with you. So you're constantly trying to 'reach'. And tell yourself you don't mind it because https://twitter.com/ugwumCee/status/1287912424876564480

...the person make sense die. Which is reason enough in itself. It now depends on if it's good enough for you.

You don't want 'plain' Jane. Even though you yourself might be 'plain' too. Pls, plain is relative btw and doesn't refer to (only) looks. It's not bad to aim 'high',...

...depending on what high means to you. This social media age people are even more about aesthetics in prospective partners so you'll be 'goals', so the 'shinier', the seemingly better. This means you're constantly waiting/reaching for shinier.

There's no mutual wanting cos it's like they're doing you a favour cos they really don't want you/the same thing as you.

Just do small self examination and see what's informing some of the decisions you make as regards choosing a companion for whatever reason.

And whatever your reasons are, as long as you're not manipulating/hurting anyone, those reasons are valid. Whether they're 'deep' reasons or not, they're valid. Just don't cry foul play if the thing you didn't pay attention to or didn't think mattered isn't offered to you within

the confines of that relationship.

Plus this goes both ways. For the people that will want to come and state the obvious.