I have a confession to make.

I am teaching 1 class this fall (Intro BioAnth), entirely online. It will have two 75-minute lectures per week, which I will record & post for students to watch asynchronously.

I have done nothing special to prepare so far.

#AcademicTwitter

It's not that I don't want to maximize my students' online learning experience. I love the material I teach, and I want the students to be engaged & excited. I've seen posts with links to potentially useful ideas.

But let me be honest about my available bandwidth right now.

I am a #WorkingMom. I have two kids under 10, who have been home without the stimulation of school or playmates since mid-March. I spend an inordinate amount of time each day trying to keep them entertained & busy. There are so. many. board games.

I'm also caring for my mom, who's not yet 70 but has Alzheimers. She's been living in our house since March, and it is a daily challenge to manage her needs and try to plan for her future.

My mom's disease, combined with my father's death last year & the existential anxiety of a global pandemic, has stretched my #MentalHealth to a near breaking point. I think in terms of getting through the day or the week. The fall syllabus does not rank on my hierarchy of needs.

On top of that, I am #adjunct faculty. I don't have strong pre-existing relationships with other members of the department, or with these students.

I've always liked the flexibility of being adjunct, but I'm not gonna lie: having no permanent academic 'home' right now is tough.

I'm sharing all of this because I find it strange that colleges in general are approaching the fall semester with a "business as usual" attitude. For those profs who have the time right now to revamp courses, maybe that's ok.

But what about the rest of us? What about those of us whose attention is divided now & will continue to be divided in September? How should we handle the implicit pressure to innovate & stimulate students whose attention will probably be likewise divided?

All of us in academia need to recognize & remember that it's not "business as usual." We need to accept that many of us are coping with exceptional challenges, & cut ourselves - and our students- some slack.

I'll put in my best effort this semester, and I hope my students learn about BioAnth. But if their biggest takeaway from my class is about empathy & self-compassion, I'm ok with that too.