Read on Twitter
Worried about maintaining follower count over the down period? Follow this ten point plan for guaranteed success:
1. Start fights with accounts with a larger follower base than you (the more personal the better). People won't like you but there's no such thing as bad press!
1. Start fights with accounts with a larger follower base than you (the more personal the better). People won't like you but there's no such thing as bad press!
2. Set up a new podcast.
I mean, obviously don't actually do it. But just put it in your bio and say "coming soon"
Call it something like: Two Pints of XG and a Packet of FPL
I mean, obviously don't actually do it. But just put it in your bio and say "coming soon"
Call it something like: Two Pints of XG and a Packet of FPL
3. Get married.
Why not pull that special day forward a couple of months? No point in getting married when everyone's worried about their TC chip!
Why not pull that special day forward a couple of months? No point in getting married when everyone's worried about their TC chip!
4. Troll thyself
When all that infamy from point 1 gets too much you'll need to play the sympathy card. Set up a second account and say rude things about yourself. Then screengrab it and watch the sympathy come rolling in.
When all that infamy from point 1 gets too much you'll need to play the sympathy card. Set up a second account and say rude things about yourself. Then screengrab it and watch the sympathy come rolling in.
5. Clickbait
6. Become an ITK account.
Think about it. No one can actually test out your team news till the season starts. Keep them hungry with random factoids about Grealish's calves and whatever you fancy about Kyle Walker
Think about it. No one can actually test out your team news till the season starts. Keep them hungry with random factoids about Grealish's calves and whatever you fancy about Kyle Walker
7. Become Norwegian
8. Start a new orthodoxy
This is high risk. But high reward. Get this wrong and you could be in the bin for good. But start the new big at the back....? You're made for life.
I suggest "big at the even further back". Two premium GKs and rotate captaincy.
This is high risk. But high reward. Get this wrong and you could be in the bin for good. But start the new big at the back....? You're made for life.
I suggest "big at the even further back". Two premium GKs and rotate captaincy.
9. No one likes a retweeter.
Forget about retweeting people. What do you think the copy and paste buttons are for!
Forget about retweeting people. What do you think the copy and paste buttons are for!
10. Can you live without me?
Let people know you're going to be off twitter for a few days. Obviously don't actually go anywhere (no one remembers that shit anyway) but make it seem as though people might actually miss you and they may start to believe it.
Let people know you're going to be off twitter for a few days. Obviously don't actually go anywhere (no one remembers that shit anyway) but make it seem as though people might actually miss you and they may start to believe it.
