lrts remind me of when i, age 14-16, was SHUNNED, HARRASSED n in general HATED in the cosplay community for not understanding what ive done wrong n never having it explained to me

rape, death threat, self harm n suicide encouragement mention //

ppl used to threaten to kill or rape me bc popular cosplayers didnt like me n didnt want me around. i was fucking CHASED around conventions n didnt feel safe for a single second during those years

i had nobody. i would get messages telling me to kill myself already DAILY. i didnt catch a single break until after i stopped associating with swedish cosplayers but even now when im 19 i still see screenshots of them talking abt me from time to time n its so fucking sickening

it annoys me so much how these ppl preach being so pc yet when a 14 y/o kid accidentally triggers another 14 y/o kid he deserves to die? he deserves to slit his wrists more? for him to get jumped at cons? right? when its a schizoid child he definitely fucking deserves it, right?

n the thing is, they still believe i deserved all of that. these adults, who were adults back then too, still think i deserved not feeling safe for years for a small mistake

yall wanna know what i did? i was gonna have a sleepover at my friends house n i had finally built up the courage to speak to someone abt my rape n i knew i could trust him n confide in him bc he had done the same for me abt his. i was wrong. he got triggered (understandable) -

n forced me to get home on my own (he lives over an hour away w/car, it was 12am n no trains were running), unfollowed me everywhere n told everyone i forcibly tried to make him speak abt his experience. thats how i got the entire swedish cosplay community to wish for my death.

i will never forgive these ppl for what they did to me

n the thing is, i dont want pity. i want justice