CW:
Right. I think I've a fair idea who/what is behind the backlash that has occurred in the last few days, and it's as bewildering as it is disappointing. I could post a bunch of screenshots detailing the jigsaw pieces that came together to form an ugly picture, but I don't

want to give the nastiness any more air. I will say a couple of things though.
- Firstly, contrary to the claims otherwise, the victim-blaming, gatekeeping, gaslighting threads, were most certainly personal about at least one of the women who came forward.

They were and are disgusting.
- Secondly, asshole men feeling entitled to use their position to continuously pressure women beyond their sexual comfort zone, is rape culture. Women feeling pressured, and responding by either trying to de-escalate the situation, or by

reluctantly shifting their boundary and then regretting it, instead of telling said guy to 'Fuck Off', is rape culture. Women feeling ashamed of being at the receiving end of this behaviour is rape culture. Women speaking out about their experiences and being undermined or mocked

is rape culture. Women regretting speaking up because of the backlash is rape culture. Defining 'rape culture' in a way that precludes harmful behaviours that lead to outcomes that are not strictly defined as rape? Rape culture. Asserting that women speaking up after feeling

harmed by certain behaviours undermines 'real victims' is rape culture. Asserting that a woman who has been harmed by certain behaviours doesn't understand the difference between regret and toxic behaviour is rape culture.

- The nature and the source of the backlash the women who have spoken up about this have received, not only hurts those affected and makes it more difficult for other women to speak, but it also takes the responsibility from the person engaging in the shitty behaviour, and places

it on all the people harmed by it. How can we fix a problem if we're not addressing the cause?

Lastly, and this is a personal request. The last couple of days have been shitty for a lot of the women who spoke up. Speaking for myself only, I've not slept much and I'm in panic mode. While getting support at home and online has been key, and I appreciate it so much, my trust

has been damaged. Like I said, I think I have a fair idea who/what is behind the backlash, but beyond a few people, I don't know who knows what. Seeing so much support for the backlash, among the people I like and follow, has hurt and it's made me paranoid. I understand that

many/most people don't know the full context of certain Tweets & sentiments, but please let me know and unfollow me, if you're not comfortable with me reaching out in private, to tell you if you've unknowingly supported the backlash. I want to be able to trust my circle again.

PS: To the guy who's looking for an apology? Go fuck yourself you utter prick.