Year 1497, in his Lisbon palace King Manuel I (called 'the fortunate') was finishing his dinner and was washing his bland food down his lily-white throat sipping Porto wine when he realized the Leitão with chips of batata and pão did not taste as good without the usual spices.

"Yuck, the food is disgusting! It almost tastes like abominable food that the wily people of 'perfidious Albion' eat across the sea! Only if I could get all the spices," he said to himself.

"Them wily Turks! After they captured Istanbul, they've blocked the spice route. All of them should be burnt on a stake!" he helplessly grumbled as spices in Europe were rare and impossible to find, yeah, even for the purple-robed kings and nobles.

"Call for Vasco and his pals" the king snapped at his servants attending in a servile manner (just like Congressis of 21st century). In less than 20 minutes Vasco Da Gama was at the feet of the king along with his 2 trusted navigator friends Pero de Alenquer and Pedro Escobar.

"What can we do for you sire?" said Vasco sheepishly unsure of what awaited him and his friends. He was trembling like the cabinet ministers and the prime minister would shiver in front of their party boss in UPA regime.

"I miss my spices and I need them now, get 'em pronto from wherever you can or y'all are dead men," warned the all powerful king with smugness and authority which could put Donald Trump to shame.

Now poor Vasco was clueless as hell but he was luckily blessed with extra sensory powers and clairvoyance which rivaled Peter Hurkos and Jeane Dixon put together. He went into a trance for a while and after a few minutes came around shouting "Eureka Eureka".

He told King Manuel he only needed a few ships and a few men to sail to an eastern land and get those much sought after pepper, cloves, cinnamon and stuff like that.

"But where will you go, Vasco?" asked the king.

Vasco even back then was a very secular man (he later proved it in in Kerala when he tortured local Hindus and Muslims with the same brutality).

"sire, we sail to 'Gandhi-land' and shall get those prized spices for you in less than a year! "

"'Gandhi-land'? WTF is that?" snapped the king. "Er.. it is that country that Megasthenes visited 1800 yrs back and Faxian wrote greatly about around 1100 yrs back. Umm.. I still can't name the country you see as it is not born yet. I'm not even sure if we can call it a country".

Vasco went on. "It is the same land sire which gave Hindoo numerals to those Arabs who later taught us to count from one to hundred. It is the same country which supplied Wootz steel to make the sword of Damascus. You remember Saladin's sword blade, so tough and sharp?"

The king grimaced and was now about to lose his cool.
Pedro Escobar meanwhile could not wait for too long and interjected. "Do you mean we are going to India, amigo? Is it the same rich country that the Persians call-Hindustan and the Greeks call India? "

"STFU you Sanghi terrorist!" snapped secular Vasco. "There is no India, obviously no Hindoostan, it is Gandhi-land just like great secular historian Hirfan Abib and secular senhora Saggy will confirm one day.

As for you Sanghi Escobar, the problem clearly lies with your terrorist-like surname!"

-------------------End--------------------

Re-posted my old thread for the benefit of those who think India was born only after 1947. --> @heunplugged

@Aabhas24