I've taken some heat for saying that it's important to learn how to be friends with people with abhorrent views and argue with them and still remain friends.

And I get it, sometime it's a matter of life and death.

1/

Saying that we should remain friends with people that espouse political ideas that are literally leading to people dying can sound like I'm saying that it doesn't matter or that we should just not care so much.

That isn't what I believe.

2/

Saying that we need to try to remain friends with people with abhorrent beliefs doesn't mean that we should just pretend that disagreement doesn't exist or let them go on in their harmful beliefs. To the contrary, we should challenge them at every step.

3/

My belief in the importance of remaining friends with people we disagree deeply with is a reflection of my belief that, no matter how much I may like to let them go to hell and go on my merry way, we are connected. Our futures are intertwined.

4/

Now, there are times when friendship needs to take a backseat to self-care. You shouldn't allow yourself to be abused. And some evils have to be met and defeated rather than persuaded.

5/

But in general, I do believe that most people who espouse hate do so because they are isolated and afraid and are listening to voices that appeal to their fear. And the more we let our hatred of their ideas bleed into hatred of them, the more justified they feel in their hate.
6/

I don't think friendship should prevent argument. I think it needs to support it. We need to call people on their BS *and* be their friends as much as they'll let us without compromising our deeply held beliefs.

That's just my opinion. Others will see it differently.

7/7