Read on Twitter
One of the weirdest things about the human experience is that if 99 people say something nice about you and 1 person says something mean, you'll likely wind up laser beam focusing on that 1 person.
"WHO IS THIS?"
"WHY DON'T THEY LIKE ME?"
"WHY WOULD THEY SAY SOMETHING SO HORRIBLE ABOUT ME?"
"And more importantly, WHY DO I CARE SO MUCH????"
"WHY DON'T THEY LIKE ME?"
"WHY WOULD THEY SAY SOMETHING SO HORRIBLE ABOUT ME?"
"And more importantly, WHY DO I CARE SO MUCH????"
I can't say for sure why a single negative comment is more affective than a bunch of positive ones (could be self-esteem-related, survival-instinct-related, etc,) but here's something to remember:
You can modify your brain's behavior by changing your own habits!
Take Twitter for example:
You know those habits you get into when someone says something hurtful to/about you?
Take Twitter for example:
You know those habits you get into when someone says something hurtful to/about you?
1) Read the tweet
2) Get offended
3) Click their profile
4) Read some of their tweets, looking for something that you can use to justify calling THEM names
5) Get into a lengthy argument
6) Maybe "win" the argument, maybe not, but feel unsatisfied either way
7) etc.
2) Get offended
3) Click their profile
4) Read some of their tweets, looking for something that you can use to justify calling THEM names
5) Get into a lengthy argument
6) Maybe "win" the argument, maybe not, but feel unsatisfied either way
7) etc.
Take some of those habits and force yourself to apply them to the 99 positive comments instead!
1) Read the tweet
2) Let yourself genuinely feel flattered
3) Click their profile
4) Find something they've said that you agree with
5) Reply with anything from a simple "like" to a gracious reply
6) Repeat
2) Let yourself genuinely feel flattered
3) Click their profile
4) Find something they've said that you agree with
5) Reply with anything from a simple "like" to a gracious reply
6) Repeat
If you actually manage to do this for allllll 99 of those positive comments, you'll have spent so much time/energy on feeling those good feels that you'll laugh off the one negative comment.
No, you don't need to do that for ALL 99, just enough for your brain to register that there are way more nice people than jerks.
As for the mean/ignorant/tasteless tweets, let them be the ones that go un-liked, unresponded, and forgotten.
You have value.
You don't need to validate their sh*tty opinions with your time.
Even if you LITERALLY have nothing to do, all day, every day, it's not worth your time.
You have value.
You don't need to validate their sh*tty opinions with your time.
Even if you LITERALLY have nothing to do, all day, every day, it's not worth your time.
