i think the endpoint of most online beefs about queer shit is actually about how much you are willing to defend/show kindness to/try and understand those of us who are most Freakish and Radical, and if you are inclined to see them as outsider enemies or family to be defended

i think there is an obvious correct answer there but even if you know it, it can take some work to deal w/ a learned distrust for “outsiders” and weirdness. i have found its useful to turn this urge away from defensiveness and towards empathetic curiosity

sometimes people who are at-a-glance offputting in some way are that way intentionally as a litmus test to find out who actually has a heart and will treat them like human beings. i think this should be obvious but many people seem shocked by it and unsure how to respond

you’d think all of us freaks would be a little more self-aware that the outside world thinks we are all disgusting and that there is no line we can draw to contain “normal” that will not ruin someone’s life by placing them outside of it, but here we are, again and again! jesus

to produce my own take about a right to label ownership— if you are not inherently on the side of the freakish and strange, if your instinct is not to see fellow outsiders as part of Us and not a Them, you do not deserve to lay claim to “queer” bc you don’t get what it means.