My child was raped. She had surgery a few months later. As she was waking from anesthesia, she began having trauma seizures. We had no idea what was going on, neither did our wonderful male nurse. We’re all in a bit of a panic. 1/6

The anesthesiologist came over and told us what was going on (based on seeing assault in her chart). As the seizures continued, the nurse is trying to be helpful and calming and held her wrist above her head, all well intentioned things. 2/6

Closed eyes, trickles of tears as she continues seizing. Later at home, she let me know she was alert enough to know he was there holding her arm and talking to her - and a male holding her arm made it worse. 3/6

This nurse is exceptional. Nicest nurse on the floor. Had him for another kid’s surgery a few years prior. Clinically solid, soft spoken, funny dad jokes. It didn’t matter though. In those moments, despite his intent, his presence made it worse for her. 4/6

If she ever has anesthesia again, I will insist on a female nurse. That isn’t because I think a single one of the male staff are a threat. It’s because when you’re in the midst of trauma, it’s instinctive. I will never put her thru that again. 5/6

I refuse to retraumatize her to be politically correct and nice. There are times when women need to put themselves separate and first. I do not, nor will I ever, apologize for this. 6/6