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I wanna address the dudes in SFF nerdspace for a second. Specifically those who reacting badly to stories of the con behaviours of certain authors.
First of... Stop trying to frame this shit as "cancel culture", or as the death of nuance. That's not the case.
First of... Stop trying to frame this shit as "cancel culture", or as the death of nuance. That's not the case.
When the cut to the crux of this shit, there's not much nuance needed.
Sexual harassment — or harassment/abuse of any kind — is unacceptable.
I doubt any of you disagree with that. And yet there are so many of you coming prepared with so many "but"s.
Sexual harassment — or harassment/abuse of any kind — is unacceptable.
I doubt any of you disagree with that. And yet there are so many of you coming prepared with so many "but"s.
I'll spell this out as simply as possible...
If a dude sexually harasses a woman, and his ONLY consequence is that people FIND OUT that he sexually harassed a woman... That dude is getting off pretty fucking lightly.
If a dude sexually harasses a woman, and his ONLY consequence is that people FIND OUT that he sexually harassed a woman... That dude is getting off pretty fucking lightly.
It doesn't matter if the incident happened yesterday, or last month, or a decade ago. It still fucking happened. Someone still lived through that shit.
It doesn't matter if the harasser "got better". He still did it.
It doesn't matter if the harasser "got better". He still did it.
I've had so many dudes crying to me about shit like "does self-improvement count for nothing?".
It's like you guys are taking offence that a harasser is being outed. Why?
Again, the only consequence these people are facing is that people now know they did something shitty.
It's like you guys are taking offence that a harasser is being outed. Why?
Again, the only consequence these people are facing is that people now know they did something shitty.
Go and read some of the stories. Go see what these people have admitted to and apologised for.
Read them and know that if that were you, you'd (rightfully) lose your job. You'd have a police report filed against you.
So why are you defending someone who is getting off so easy?
Read them and know that if that were you, you'd (rightfully) lose your job. You'd have a police report filed against you.
So why are you defending someone who is getting off so easy?
Another thing that's lost sight of here is that when these things make it to Twitter, most of the time it's due to repeat offences.
One-off "mistakes" don't generally kickstart a whisper network. Stop giving the benefit of the doubt to those who don't deserve it.
One-off "mistakes" don't generally kickstart a whisper network. Stop giving the benefit of the doubt to those who don't deserve it.
Just because you liked someone's book or their funny tweets shouldn't buy your loyalty.
When you defend harassers, even in defence of "nuance", you perpetuate the toxic culture that allowed the harassment to happen in the first place.
When you defend harassers, even in defence of "nuance", you perpetuate the toxic culture that allowed the harassment to happen in the first place.
These stories of harassment at cons are not a new problem. The only thing "new" is that they're being spoken about publicly, in detail, and naming names.
It might make you uncomfortable, but consider that no other preventive measure has worked so far. Naming and shaming works.
It might make you uncomfortable, but consider that no other preventive measure has worked so far. Naming and shaming works.
It's time for men to stop arguing over useless fucking semantics when it comes to this shit, and deal with the fucking problem. Because we ARE the fucking problem.
Stop excusing creepy behaviour from your friends and idols. Call that shit out.
Consider how your own actions might be creepy. Cut that shit out.
And for the love of fuck, stop turning these black and white issues into nonsensical, pseudophilosophical bullshit "debates".
Consider how your own actions might be creepy. Cut that shit out.
And for the love of fuck, stop turning these black and white issues into nonsensical, pseudophilosophical bullshit "debates".
My head is a mess as I type all this. I hate writing this kinda shit as it too often looks (and feels) purely performative. Especially when others have said it better.
But if we wanna make our culture safer, we have to call this shit out and start holding each other accountable.
But if we wanna make our culture safer, we have to call this shit out and start holding each other accountable.
