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21 years this weekend. still frustrated that i’m buying plastic fucking flowers for his grave instead of having him teach me how to use my camera or swap stories about our adventures or embark on them together. https://twitter.com/jaslpotts/status/1141213401298849793
still sad & hurt when i think about him coming into my sister and i’s bedrooms and giving us kisses before going to kill himself. not taking two more minutes to hold us and talk himself off the edge or wake my mom up. just deciding he was finished.
today my heart and love goes out to men/fathers who have been/currently are being sexually abused by someone and don’t feel like they have to voice to tell anyone. just toting around years of hurt over something that wasn’t/isn’t your fault.
today my heart goes out to the men/dads dealing with substance abuse/mental health problems but still do their absolute best every single day for their family. who wake up & immediately feel like they have to put on a mask so their loved ones don’t see how much they’re struggling
my whole life all i’ve heard about is how much my dad loved my mom and my sisters and i. something that i no longer feel like i have to question. i wish everyday that while saying his goodbyes to us he would’ve felt some kind of strength to stick around & keep fighting bc i know
if he was still here he woulda been my best friend. i feel that every time i think about him. i hope for the dads out there with little ones and who feel like they’re struggling everyday you can find your peace because your children really do need you for the long haul.
all the pain that you’re feeling right now - it’s going to mean so much that you’re still there when your children are grown and dealing with similar things. they don’t stop needing you at 18. happy father’s day pops 
