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One time back in college I remember talking w a friend about how we spit game and I told her I don't feel comfortable making a move unless I got "the green light" and I always felt I was weird/different for that??
Looking back I realize what I was talking about was CONSENT
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Looking back I realize what I was talking about was CONSENT
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Looking back, I see that instinct i had to wait for consent, against "going for it and getting what I want" was not an attitude commonly shared by a lot of guys I knew growing up. I always felt like the outlier/lesser to these dudes boasting about all the girls they'd get
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Which just drives home the fact that CONSENT is not normalized enough in our cultures. We shouldn't have to wait for guys in their mid 20s to mature and get better, we need to teach hormonal teenagers at the START before they get/learn any shitty ideas and hurt people.
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I always joke about having no dad but I've always known it to be a blessing. I'm glad i didn't have a masculine figure in the house teaching me that to be a man is to take what you want and thinking only about yourself. (not generalizing dads here, but I know mine would've)
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And for grown men who still don't know what consent means or looks like: there's a lot to unpack and unlearn. Starting with your earliest lessons on what being a man means. Get to it.
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