Read on Twitter
Thread: Not a cry for help, but struggling a bit at moment. I seem to be missing far more social cues than usual and finding people and interactions increasingly difficult to handle. Absolutely terrified about 2 metre rule being reduced, not from Covid but people being close 1/
Something no-one warns you about when you are diagnosed as autistic, or at least didn't warn me, was how guilty it can make you feel. I've recently had to leave a couple of groups of people, who are genuinely fantastic, because I can't trust myself to know how to be a friend. 2/
Seems an odd thing to say at 38, and I am fortunate to have some great friendships, but I honestly don't know how to be a friend. I spend so much time rehashing everything I've said or done terrified I may have upset or offended someone, and feeling guilty even when I haven't. 3/
I read a great thread by @commaficionado earlier about the simple steps employers can take to help #AllAutistics. What it made me think was, and I only know this for myself and don't know if this is common or not, was how guilty being autistic makes me for being different. 4/
There are positives, I can create campaigns, policies and messaging ideas faster and more effectively than many. I can see patterns that others miss. What I can't see past though is a constant feeling of guilt that I have let people down. 5/
As I said at the start of this, it isn't a cry for help. There is a point. On social media in particular you are guided only by what someone writes, not how it is meant, facial expressions or tone. In a way that is better for me to be honest. 6/
It provides an issue though. You don't see the whole picture. You don't see the person behind the screen struggling. You don't see them lying awake running through every comment they have posted. You don't see the guilt they feel for "not being good enough". 7/
