"Don't ask me what I did. Ask me what I did not do. I did not clip her wings, and that's all."— Malala Yousafzai's dad

My dad, too.

As a toddler he would strap me in a backpack & go on long hikes, exploring nature: forests, streams, hills. He took me to the library every week.

My dad called himself the “laundry king." He learned how to French braid my hair & would spray my hair every morning with “No More Tears” tangle spray & put it in two braids. He equally shared parenting. It wasn’t special that he did laundry & braided my hair.

It was sensible.

When I was five years he asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.

“Judge or a waitress,” I replied.

He let me know implicitly & explicitly from that very young age that I could be, & would be, anything I wanted.

In high school my dad gave me an internship at the local newspaper he ran. He lent me his camera, taught me how to use it & let me take photos of community events for print.

He trusted me. He let me grow.

When I was a Mormon missionary in Barcelona, Spain my dad sent one postcard a day to me the entire 18 months. He made them himself, cut out of cardstock & decorated. They were eccentric reminders that he never forgot about me.

Not even for one day.

My dad is the kind of father you would find in a world where the word “feminist” is not needed. Where the fact that women & men are equal is so very apparent & obvious that stating it goes completely w/out saying. Gender parity comes naturally.

It's not a gift, it's a given.

When I told my dad (a convert to Mormonism for 30 years, at that point) I wanted to start a group called Ordain Women, he said, “you were born for this” & started preparing a profile, even knowing what he had sacrificed to be Mormon.

Which, was a lot. https://ordainwomen.org/project/hi-im-jim/

After I was excommunicated, he went to church one final time. It was Fast & Testimony meeting (audience speaks extemporaneously) & he told the entire congregation that I had done nothing wrong. He said that THEY should be ashamed.

He walked away that day & never went back.

Girls learn by example, & I have learned:

A father is someone who stands up for his daughters.

A father is someone who looks at his girl children & sees possibility. He propels their potential.

A father is someone who lets you know, every day of your life, that your worth has nothing to do w how you look, what other people say abt you or who you are partnered with.

A father has your back.

Happy Father's Day this week to all who love your kids so unconditionally

(And, yes. I know I look exactly like him )

There is no better way to build confident women than to have parents who support them without reservation.

/fin