My high school (a very white, suburban school) is currently facing a reckoning with current Black students & past Black graduates speaking out about the racism. It forced me to think back to my years there & confront an ugly truth. I failed my Black classmates. #BlackLivesMatter

As I read through the stories on social media, I couldn't help but think back to my time there. It forced me to recall both the racism masquerading as "jokes" and the explicit, unvarnished racism. I laughed along at the "jokes," and I said nothing when I saw the explicit racism.

We are a product of our environment. I grew up in an environment that had very few people of color in it. It wasn't until college that I had a diverse group of friends & gained a fuller perspective. I can only thank those friends for their patience with me as I grew as a person.

I look back at my high school years & cringe now. It pains me to see what sort of person I was. I must apologize to my Black classmates for not being a better person & friend. I laughed at the awful jokes. I didn't stand up with you when I should have. I owed you that & more.

We like to see ourselves as the hero of our own story. It is hurting me to look back & see myself in such a different light. But this is necessary. I am a product of my environment, but that is not an acceptable excuse. I could have been better. I must hold myself accountable.

I now constantly assess myself for implicit biases. I constantly challenge myself to be better. I am not perfect, but I am capable of self-reflection & improvement, always. I will not repeat the mistakes of my past. I am accountable for them & will be a better man moving forward.

So to all of the people I failed in my past, I apologize. You deserved better. I will stand up with you from now on. And when I have children, I will raise them to be better people than I was/am. I will make sure they are taught to stand up, not sit down, when they see injustice.