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(Thread) With it being pride month and all, and me having discovered my bisexuality about 1.5 years ago, let me give some advice and things I’ve learned to those unsure or new to discovering their own bisexuality:
1. No, bisexuality is not you transitioning to being gay or you in denial that you’re gay. While it is true some people discover they’re truly gay after participating in straight dates or relationships, that’s not the same thing as liking more than one gender.
2. That being said, while bisexuality is a valid sexuality, some people may further discover they are pansexual. It’s ok to update knowledge of yourself with new information. That’s what you should be doing. You’re discovering yourself.
3. Pansexuality means gender is not a factor in attraction. This does not mean bisexuality dislikes NB people or discriminates, it just means you definitely love things about the genders themselves. This is why bi is different from pan. (And nothing is wrong with either)
4. Most bisexual people end up liking each gender for different reasons. For example the things I find attractive in a female are different than with a male.
5. Nearly all bisexuals will go through “the bi-cycle”. There will be a week where one gender seems extra attractive over the other, then a different gender the next week, then all of them the next week. This is something almost every bi can relate with.
6. Despite the cycle, that does not mean all bisexuals are equally attracted to all genders. Some may heavily prefer one gender over another. Or maybe the “range of attractive people” in one gender is smaller than the other.
7. Sometimes you will discover a crush before a physical attraction when you’re discovering you’re bi. I did at least. So don’t be confused if when questioning yourself, let it play out.
8. Sometimes the things that hurt the most can be subtle. For example hearing some Christians I knew say “it’s ok, we *all* have our sins to bear” has stabbed my heart more than what an outwardly dumb homophobe has said. BUT, supportive friends will help more than whatever hurts.
9. If you are bisexual and you end up dating, marrying, or loving someone of the opposite sex/gender, basically a hetero relationship, you are *not* suddenly no longer bisexual. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
10. If you know someone else who’s bi and are struggling with determining if you are, most are glad to help you or talk to you about it. We went through it too.
Oh yeah and another thing:
11. You may discover your bisexuality (or other sexuality) later on. You’d think it’d be while you’re a teenager but some don’t discover until later. I discovered when I was 23.
11. You may discover your bisexuality (or other sexuality) later on. You’d think it’d be while you’re a teenager but some don’t discover until later. I discovered when I was 23.
