No matter how much I chafe against conforming to male gender expectations, I am not transgender. I could never menstruate not matter if I had my body surgically altered to resemble a woman's body. Only one sex menstruates, and that sex is the female sex. Only girls and women.
Calling out women who remind us of that basic fact of biology as "TERFs" and "transphobic" is participating in the very patriarchy you think you are fighting. It's when people can step outside of the structure that is defined by patriarchy (and momentum of societal acceptance)
without proclaiming a "gender," that they break the cycle of gender dominance. It's when people can realize that women and girls are oppressed specifically because they are "reduced to their genitals," that they can break down the patriarchy.
Threats of violence against TERFs are threats against women, and it's not acceptable to be woke and liberal if you facilitate or passively accept the threats. Character assassination of women such as JK Rowling, Maya Forstater, Meghan Murphey and the late Magdalen Berns
among thousands of others perpetuates sexism. If you are prone to "self-crit," crit on that for a while before joining in on the dogpile.