I have a few words for the heterosexual (especially masculine) men.

I'll begin with male privilege.
As a man, I can walk the streets at night and casually greet other men. I can go into bathrooms and crash at other people's homes without having to worry about being sexually violated. As fellow men, you know this is our reality. We live in a

society that is centred around US. We live in what one might term a man's world.
We might not realise it, but we are privileged to do myriad things. We do not have to fear getting murdered or harassed for merely existing.

WOMEN DO NOT HAVE THAT LUXURY.

The life of the average woman is one filled with constant fear. Our society upholds men and regards women as second-class citizens. Even many of our laws unreasonably discriminatory towards women. It is not uncommon for them to get oppressed by the privileged

gender.
Thus, many crimes are committed against women, with the perpetrators getting away with it more often than not.
Many women move around in large groups because they fear being attacked and assaulted by men. All around the world, women carry items to

defend themselves because they know there is a man lurking in the shadows.

THESE ARE NOT THE WORRIES OF THE AVERAGE MAN.

Now that we've established this, I'm going to zero in on one of the horrors women go through at the hands of men. That is rape.

Listen very, very carefully, men.

When people hear the word 'rape', what comes to mind is usually violence. I'm here to tell you it's not merely that.
Rape is simply sex without consent. Any act pertaining to one's sexual partner made without the permission of the partner is classified as rape. That

involves continuing sex when a partner wants to stop or secretly removing a condom to "hit it raw". There is no consent. It is rape.
Which pretty much defines a lot of the things men do.

It's reflected in the "little" things you do as young boys, the absence of consent. Groping a girl's body and running away, "tapping current", grinding up against her to get a feel. All these things you see as normal dismiss with "boys will be boys".

These are disgusting acts and you should be ashamed of yourself.

Women are not objects of sexual pleasure. They are not playthings. They are sentient creatures with autonomy, just like you and me. They deserve to be treated with respect and human dignity, not raped and murdered. Not groped, not constantly harassed.

Now, boys, there's this thing called rape culture. It basically refers to the ideas shared among people as norm - ideas that enable and promote rape and sexual assault on women. Some of the ideas that make up rape culture include

slut-shaming (basically, shaming women for dressing as they want and interacting/being intimate with whoever they choose because apparently it does not please men). It's in the words you use and the normalisation of blatant sexualisation of women's (especially

strangers/women with whom you are not intimate) bodies.

Rape culture is ignoring the dehumanising nature of rape and the many effects that come with it. It's blaming rape victims for being raped, claiming they were "indecently" dressed

(btw people can dress however the fuck they want; they don't need your approval), claiming they must have provoked the rapist. It's silencing victims and making mockery of them, it's telling jokes that invalidate the seriousness of rape.

IT'S WHEN YOU KNOW YOUR FRIENDS ARE RAPISTS OR SEXUAL ABUSERS AND KEEP QUIET ABOUT IT.

I bet you've heard of the Bro Code. I'll have you know it's one of the enablers of rape. Because Adamu is your bro and you want to ride or die with him always,

you support him when he rapes women. So when he tells you "I fucked that babe last night o. She no wan gree but as per sharp guy wey I be, I do am", you don't call him out. You don't stay away from him. You don't report him.

You laugh.

Because "Bros before Hoes" you never stop to caution your friends when they act like total assholes to women. You take their side even when they're glaringly wrong.

I stayed in a boy's hostel for a measly nine months and heard a myriad things from slut-shaming to casually-suggested gang-rape.

Men.

These are only some of the reasons women cannot feel comfortable in their own skin.

So when you really think about it, their anger and hatred is highly justified. Continued oppression tends to stir resentment. This is why the saying "men are trash" is so rampant these days. Not

because some high school girl got her heart broken. But because women have faced hell at the hands of men. Many, if not all of our female friends, have been assaulted one way or the other at some point, some not even realising it because they don't properly understand

what constitutes abuse.

You are silent when these things happen, even though you know it's happening. But when women decide to verbally express their frustration, when they say men are scum, you will come with your rectangle head and say "nOt aLl mEn". As if that somehow changes

anything. When they speak up about their abuse at your hands, you say "but men get raped too" because you want to divert attention from the matter at hand. You constantly attack feminists and try to "explain" that feminism is not misandry even though you are the cause of the

misandry that barely affects you.

The truth is that you want to remain at the centre of everything. You are not content with the fact that you are part of the focus of feminism. You hate the fact that it focuses on you as the villain and

not the other way around, because it does not stroke your fragile ego. For this reason you continue to despise a movement designed for liberation from YOU. Unwittingly making yourself the villain.

Pretty daft, if you ask me.

At this point, you should already understand that somehow or the other, you have probably raped someone before. You have probably assaulted/harassed someone before. You have been an enabler of rape,

thinking you were being neutral by standing on the sidelines when women were suffering even though doing nothing from a position of privilege makes you an enabler.
You can always stop being such a shitty person. I'll tell you how.

Acknowledge the fact that you have male privilege. Many pretend this is a lie. Don't be one of them. Understand that as someone with privilege, it literally wouldn't kill you to use that privilege to fight for/with those who don't have it.

Stop using your male privilege to make life harder and more terrifying for women. Show that you truly care. Show that you have empathy and a conscience. Join the fight for equal rights so it can be won sooner. And actually MEAN IT.

DO NOT RAPE WOMEN. Honestly, the fact that I even have to ask you to do the barest minimum is depressing. Women own their bodies. You are NOT entitled to them for whatsoever reason.
Understand the concept of concept and never forget it.

NO means NO. It does not mean "try harder". She said no, bro. Leave her the fuck alone. Don't be a creep.
YES means YES, but even then, YES can become NO. Consent can be withdrawn. I can give you consent to touch my hair. That does not mean you should keep touching it if I

ask you to stop. Do you get it?

The fact that you have had sex with someone before does not mean you can have sex with them again without their consent. This is very common in marriages (news flash: our laws don't

recognise marital rape). Always seek consent first before doing anything remotely intimate with a woman.
Consent is key. It is not "sexy" - that just makes it sound like a stupid kink that anyone can choose to like. It is a prerequisite.

When a woman who has been abused decides to come out about it, do not be the stupid fuck who says "but men are raped too" or "not all men". We know that not all men are that vile, we know that

there are people with actual empathy, but bringing it up at a time like this is just insensitive and disruptive.
You literally do not have to centre your ego in everything. Sympathise. Offer help if you can.

For clarification, boys, the saying "men are trash" isn't even specific when you really think about it. It could mean some men, it could mean many men are scum.

The only reason you get so pressed by it is because you see yourself in the men being called out. So you try to exonerate yourself by saying "not all men".
Congratulations, you have "defeated" feminists with one simple statement. Ode.

Do not blame the victim. Don't ask why she was wearing a skirt (women in hijab and babies in diapers get raped too, you bloody clown). Do not ask why she was where she was, be it alone in a bedroom with the rapist or in a church at night.

Don't call her foolish for trusting the rapist (many rapists are relatives, who we tend to trust by default).
It's okay to ask people to take precautions, but for fuck's sake, no victim should be blamed for their own trauma.
Blame the rapist for raping her. The only

cause of rape is rapists and those who continue to enable them.

Call out your rapist/abuser friends. When they say or do things that constitute offenses against women, check them. Tell them to stop. Tell them it is wrong. Even better, you can report

them so that they're no longer a threat to anyone. Or you could just stop being friends with them. If you see women being oppressed and you can do something about it, doing nothing means you are enabling the oppressor.

"With great power comes great responsibility". Does this

mean nothing to you?

Understand that minors cannot give consent. If a minor agrees to have sex with you, an adult, it is still rape. It's called statutory rape, because a minor cannot consent to sex. And it is just as

horrible as raping a fellow adult. It is manipulative and predatory. Desist from it. If a minor offers you sex, don't use that as an excuse to rape her. Decline her offer. Report her if the need arises. It is really that simple.

Keep it in your trousers. It is better to be branded a coward or spoil sport than to be a rapist.

Remember that you are not being asked to carry the weight of the world on your back. You are not being asked to die in a desert. You are simply being asked to be decent human beings by not raping women, by not supporting vile acts against women.

Can you just try and do that?

It's not hard at all.