Hanekawa Tsubasa and the necessity of self-acceptance

[THREAD]

It's known that the characters in Monogatari are all heavily flawed, battling with their own inner demons that represent their insecurities & trauma, yet overcoming that predicament in their respective arcs. But among them there is one who can't quite do this, and that's Hanekawa

Hanekawa's previous oubursts are always concluded by someone else suppressing her Sawarineko, & while that does solve the immediate issue, it only continues to bottle up the stressful emotions that plague her. It's like shaking up a fizzy drink day after day, but never opening it

In addition to this, Hanekawa always locking away the "black" side of herself & only exposing the "white" side to those around her is a poisonous character complex. Her repressed emotions fusing with her oddity are what result in the monster that is Black Hanekawa

It's only fitting that her oddity is a cat, beings that are representations of naughtiness and mischief, but also cunning and sneaky. Having nine lives like many faces or masks, never revealing their true appearance

Her outward appearance is presented as picture perfect and reliable. The running gag of humility with her signature line: "I don't know everything. I only know what I know" is completely contradictory given that

Hanekawa IS a deconstruction of the girl next door trope

One look at her situation and you understand the root of it all. A fake family, an illusory home, no room for herself, but she accepts it. That's why she defends being abused by her father, sleeps on the floor without complaint, and eats alone

It's extremely backwards because her continuous acceptance is what results in more and more abuse. The perfect image feeding into her parents thinking she is condescending. She's a victim of her own circumstance, and continues a self-abusing lifestyle

All of this aptly builds up to her arc in Second Season where we begin to see her begin to realize what she has been running from, and what she truly wants

I think the best representation of this "turning point" is meeting Kako at a crossroads, showing their different directions

That journey begins with her visit to Senjougahara's apartment, where she experiences the warmth of a home. Where the people who keep you company spend time talking, eating meals, bathing, and sleeping. Senjougahara letting what is essentially her "rival" into her home -

is a testament to how she has overcome her fear of trusting others, but it also reflects the side of herself that accepts everything about Hanekawa, even her black side, especially as someone who was once in her situation. It's the first mental support she receives on the journey

The moment of her self-actualization for me is when she visit's Araragi's home next. She is reminded that simply being accepted into a home and by your "family" is not enough. Unless she's happy herself, then there's no point

It's here that she has to contemplate whether she is going to face her black side head-on, and as an extension of that, her family and home situation; Or if she is going to discard everything and hit the reset, effectively running away from her problems

One of the best representations of Monogatari's central idea of "no-one can save you but yourself" is Hanekawa's letter to Black. Instead of running away, instead of falsely accepting everything, instead of relying on someone else, she finally relies on herself for help

At the climax of Tsubasa Tiger she accepts all the parts of herself. The angelic image of White Hanekawa, the negative emotions of Black Hanekawa, and the manifestation of her envy, Kako. Her name has changed many times, but they all make up the person that is "Hanekawa Tsubasa"

In the end Hanekawa is able to be herself for once. She can confess her feelings to the guy she loves, she can be rejected, she can reach out to the feelings she locked away, and she can finally cry her heart out. It's one of the most beautiful character arcs I've ever seen

Hanekawa is one of the greatest female characters I've ever witnessed. She's eloquent, attractive, and enigmatic, but also VERY flawed, ugly, and most of all, human. Truly near and dear to me, so if you made it this far then thanks for reading

And remember to stan Hanekawa