There is a purple box, in a rarely opened closet in my house, of my daughter’s clothes.

The clothes with the bullet holes she was wearing the last day she breathed.

It’s tiny, b/c she was only 6.

Despite this, there’ve been people & groups organized to deny its existence.

And for those same many years, people have blown them off as “crazy” or “not that serious”.

I tried to tell you about the damage. I told you about the privilege of this behavior & the underlying currents of toxic masculinity, distrust of government, anti-semitism, racism. FEAR.

This was never “the Sandy Hook families think they’re special”. I feel so many things. Special is not one of them.

I was trying to tell you there was danger to ALL of us when pain and reality are denied.

The Holocaust.
9/11
Mass Shootings

and now? Covid-19.

Why? Because the same confluence of factors motivate these people. It’s about power and control. The selfishness and rot required to lead protests en masse to reopen does not surprise me. Because many of us saw this coming.

It happened here. We live the terror of pain denied.

You are not helpless:

1). Be intentional re: starting conversations with friends and family about current events.

2). Push back on denialism

3). Be curious about fear

4). Take their comments seriously

5). Pay attention to whose pain is denied. It signals a lot.

-NMG

Please, stay home. You don’t want a purple box.