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BDSM- Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, Masochism 
Submissive- Someone who submits to a Dominant person during sexual encountersDominant- Someone who receives submission from a submissive person during sexual encounters
Aftercare- Care, time, and attention given to partners after an intense sexual encounter Tonight I’m going to discuss aftercare from a sub’s perspective.
Aight so boom, aftercare.
I feel that aftercare is often the most overlooked and in my opinion the most important part of sex (after consent) there is.
I’m here to talk my shit and bring the thought and discussion of aftercare to the forefront of your kinky little minds.
I feel that aftercare is often the most overlooked and in my opinion the most important part of sex (after consent) there is.
I’m here to talk my shit and bring the thought and discussion of aftercare to the forefront of your kinky little minds.
We spend plenty of time talking about sex, day dreaming about sex, plotting on ways to get sex but how often do we sit and think about what we need after sex?
When was the last time you sat and honestly considered what you need after your back has been broke?
When was the last time you sat and honestly considered what you need after your back has been broke?
When was the last time you sat and said “Self how would you like to be treated after you’ve made a mess of the sheets and you’re laid out like a used and abused rag doll?”
When was the last time you’ve communicated those needs to your partner?
When was the last time you’ve communicated those needs to your partner?
Matter of fact when was the last time your partner asked you what those needs are?
We place a lot of focus on foreplay and the actual act of sex itself but who’s there to catch us when we come down from the high? How do we want to be guided back into the here and now after we’ve just reached the heavens and a little piece of us died and rebirthed?
Do you really think you can just abruptly slam back to earth after you were up there getting your cheeks clapped on cloud 9?
You can’t and you shouldn’t and as a bratty sub who has unfortunately had to do that before I’m going to tell you why.
You can’t and you shouldn’t and as a bratty sub who has unfortunately had to do that before I’m going to tell you why.
As a sub you find yourself putting your trust in your Dom. You find yourself letting go of your inhibitions and handing over control.
You trust your Dom to keep you safe and to know and respect your limits. You trust them to guide you to the highest highest you can handle.
You trust your Dom to keep you safe and to know and respect your limits. You trust them to guide you to the highest highest you can handle.
Why then would you not trust them to bring you back down to earth safely?
A Doms job isn’t done when the sex is over. A Doms job is done when you the sub have been guided safely out of subspace and are able to rejoin the world clear headed and whole.
A Doms job isn’t done when the sex is over. A Doms job is done when you the sub have been guided safely out of subspace and are able to rejoin the world clear headed and whole.
Let me paint a picture for you ...
You’re with a Dom, could be yours could be just a play partner, and you agree to intense impact play and degradation.
Things are going amazing. You’re deep in subspace totally zoned out and locked in.
You’re with a Dom, could be yours could be just a play partner, and you agree to intense impact play and degradation.
Things are going amazing. You’re deep in subspace totally zoned out and locked in.
You’re being pushed, pulled, degraded, spanked, choked, paddled and told what a filthy fucking slut you are and how you’d better take it all and like it.
And you do. You fucking do.
And you do. You fucking do.
The scene is incredibly intense and your body is humming and vibrating on a level you’ve never ever reached before. You’re being devoured and all you can do is stand in the fire and be consumed.
You both reach your limit and the climax is everything you hoped for. The literal heavens parted. The universe ripped in two. You died and you lived and you died again.
Your Dom gets up suddenly, throws you a towel, says “Thanks babe that was great!” and turns on the tv.
Your Dom gets up suddenly, throws you a towel, says “Thanks babe that was great!” and turns on the tv.
What. The. Fuck.
????
What just happened here? One second you we’re getting choked and told what a dirty fucking whore you are and the next second you’re watching Divorce Court?!?!
Oh no baby. I think the fuck NOT.
AFTERCARE!!
????
What just happened here? One second you we’re getting choked and told what a dirty fucking whore you are and the next second you’re watching Divorce Court?!?!
Oh no baby. I think the fuck NOT.
AFTERCARE!!
You can’t and shouldn’t ever be put in or have to deal with a situation where you are stretched to your limits (literally and figuratively 
) by your Dom and then left to lay in the wet spot and try to wrap your head around what just happened.
Aftercare.
) by your Dom and then left to lay in the wet spot and try to wrap your head around what just happened. Aftercare.
So, what’s aftercare?
Aftercare is the ride down from the high. Aftercare is the opposite of foreplay. Instead of getting hyped up and ready for sex/a scene it’s easing on down from the high. Together.
Aftercare is the ride down from the high. Aftercare is the opposite of foreplay. Instead of getting hyped up and ready for sex/a scene it’s easing on down from the high. Together.
Aftercare looks different for everyone just like foreplay is different for everyone. That’s why it is so important to figure out your aftercare needs and then effectively communicate them with your Dom.
Aftercare much like Trojan magnums is not one size fits all.
Aftercare much like Trojan magnums is not one size fits all.
As a sub I know it can sometimes be hard to speak up. We don’t want to feel demanding. We don’t want to be asked a bunch of questions. We don’t want to upset Daddy. Let me tell you this, if Daddy is really Daddy then Daddy will care about your aftercare. Talk to Daddy.
Doms talk to your subs. You got time to shove a 10inch dildo up princess’s ass while you fuck from behind then I know you got time to ask princess how princess wants to be treated after a session.
Fellow subs don’t be afraid to communicate your needs. I’ll give an example.
Fellow subs don’t be afraid to communicate your needs. I’ll give an example.
Personally after a good degradation session I like to be praised.
Yes I am a filthy worthless cum hungry whore for Daddy but also I need to be told how special, well behaved, and sweet I am. I need that balance.
Yes I am a filthy worthless cum hungry whore for Daddy but also I need to be told how special, well behaved, and sweet I am. I need that balance.
After impact play I need to be held and massaged on my sore spots. I need to be told “Thank you” so that I know my tolerance for pain was appreciated.
Ask yourself what you need and how you need to be eased back into the land of the living after your Dom has taken you down to hell and made you pay your way out with orgasms.
Do you need water? A snack? Your stuffie?
Would you like a sweet treat? A blunt? Some praise?
Do you need water? A snack? Your stuffie?
Would you like a sweet treat? A blunt? Some praise?
What does YOUR aftercare consist of?
Make it a priority for each and every sexual encounter you have from now going forward. You deserve.
Make it a priority for each and every sexual encounter you have from now going forward. You deserve.
As a sub aftercare is extremely important to me. I can’t have my Dom just roll over and go to sleep after I’ve felt him rip my soul in two.
I like to have a drink, stretch, talk about what just happened, receive praise, cuddle, ice down any bruises or hickies etc etc
I like to have a drink, stretch, talk about what just happened, receive praise, cuddle, ice down any bruises or hickies etc etc
When you’re in subspace during a scene/session it is such an intense head space to be in. You can’t reach those heights and come crashing back down and think you’ll be good to go. Don’t do that to yourself.
Aftercare. Get what you need.
And that’s that on that. End scene.
Aftercare. Get what you need.
And that’s that on that. End scene.
